Group Discussions

How do you split up cooking duties?

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  Are you the chef of the house? Is your spouse? Do you split things 50/50? Do your kids cook? Just wondering what others do and how you negotiate the responsibility of cooking?
  
  I do probably 80-90 percent of meal preparation. I also usually decide what we have. I have gotten this responsibility mainly because I'm the one who knows how to cook. But another factor is that I was born and raised vegetarian. Therefore, my husband (having grown up eating meat) feels intimidated to come up with meals. However, we do have some staple meals now that he knows how to prepare.

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by mamajama on 19th September 2007
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  Hi, Mamajama,
  
  I do probably about 70 percent of the cooking; my husband enjoys cooking, but somehow I end up doing it more often. Most of the time, it's relaxing and I love it, but there are some days when I'd be happy to eat anything as long as I don't have to be the one to prepare it!
  
  I tend to do all the baking, though. Partially because I love to bake, and partially because I have more interest and experience in the gluten-free, casein-free cooking and baking that we have to do for our two kids with food allergies.
  
  We're teaching our bigger kids (almost 14, 11 1/2, and 9 years old) to cook a few things -- things like scrambled eggs, grilled cheese, mac and cheese -- and the little ones (almost 3, and 10 months old) like to sit on the floor in the kitchen and pretend to cook (or rummage through the spice drawers and smell everything).

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by Lylah M. Alphonse on 19th September 2007
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  Well, let's see - I cook, my husband cleans
  He can actually cook a few things - but it's a big production... so we've figured out that I cook and he'll help out by cleaning. It's fine - but sometimes I get really tired of it, and I'll ask him to do something. Usually that means a simple salmon dish, but I'll take it!

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by Nataly on 19th September 2007
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  Like you, Nataly, I cook and he cleans. He's a great cook, too, but since the kids came and they eat at such set times I'm the one keeping track and making sure meals get made. But I have no qualms about leaving a mess at night so I can get them bathed and in bed b/c he doesn't mind coming home and cleaning it up. Well, not usually!

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by Mandy Nelson - Dandysound on 19th September 2007
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  That's awesome that you guys have men that like to clean...I have a man that tolerates cleaning...sometimes (but mostly I don't really mind)
  
  Lylah, I've been hearing alot about gluten-free and casein free diets lately. How did you guys find out that those were your kids allergies?...I saw something about it on Oprah the other day, and I'm really curious.

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by mamajama on 20th September 2007
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  Hi, Mamajama,
  
  I didn't see the Oprah show, but I've heard so much about it I think I'm going to have to find a way to watch it...
  
  Our 9-year-old was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrom about 3 1/2 years ago -- it's a mild form of Autism. One of the first things doctors and therapists told us to do was to cut gluten and casein (the protein in dairy products) out of his diet entirely. For kids like our boy, those two protiens often act like opiates -- they get all spacey and can't concentrate, and they "stim" a lot (think tapping, spinning, being jittery, etc) -- because their bodies can't process those protiens. So, really, for him, they're not allergies but food intolerances. (allergies trigger an auto-immune reaction, intolerances don't). We also had him tested for a bunch of allergies, and for a while he was off of all egg, corn, and soy products as well (thankfully, he seems to have outgrown those).
  
  Our 14-year-old had an actual wheat allergy when she was a toddler, and it seems to have come back full-force -- she gets horrible eczema now, and the doctors currently think it is, at least in part, an auto-immune reaction to wheat gluten. Basically, she eats the stuff, and her immune system goes into overdrive and attacks her skin. We're consulting with a bunch of dermatologists, to figure out how best to treat it, but taking her off wheat seems to help (aside from the fact that she is royally pissed off about it, but that may be part and parcel of teenagerhood, too).

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by Lylah M. Alphonse on 20th September 2007
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  Hey Lylah,
  
  Thanks so much for sharing. I have known some children with Autism and Asperger's Syndrome, and I am fascinated about the subject. But I had never heard about the dietary restrictions/alterations before watching the Oprah show. It sounds like you do an amazing job of cooking for the multiple dietary needs of your family! Your poor 14 year old. As if adolescence weren't enough! I think I'd be pissed off too.
  
  Take care!

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by mamajama on 21st September 2007