Group Discussions

New Mom Without a Mom

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  HI, I am a new mom. We recently adopted a beautiful baby boy (he is 7 monthsold now) and I am over the moon. The only thing missing is my mom. She passed away before my son was born. She always new that I wanted to be a mom and always told me that I would be a great one. I feel so bad because my son is missing out on knowing one of the greatest women in the world and I know she would have been an amazing Grandma. Afterall, she considered my cocker spaniel her Granddaughter. Iit's very, very hard without her. She was in addtion to my mom, my best friend.

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by Diane on 25th March 2008
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  *hugs* Diane-
  I know it is difficult, my mom passed in 1998. She never met my hubby, never got to meet my kids. Shoe would have LOVED my husband and would have ADORED the kids. It took me a long time to not be so sad. She had a very rough life though, and was very sick. We have her photos in the living room (we have a very neat one from the 1940's- her high school graduation picture) and my kids know that Grandma Joyce is happy in heaven (even though they don't really know what heaven is yet).
  Just know that she is there watching over you and knows that you have found such happiness and joy in your baby boy.
  ~earthmama

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by earthmama on 26th March 2008
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  Hi Diane!
  
  Congrats on your litte boy. My husband lost his mother two years ago. The night she died, I found out I was prego. I had a little girl. We also have a little boy. We always say that their grandma would have loved to be a part of their lives everyday.
  
  I have my mom and I know how much I would feel what you are feeling. I am sorry.
  Enjoy your boy and your mom knows you are indeed a great mom.
  

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by momof2lovelies on 26th March 2008
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  Hi Diane, I'm so happy for you that you have your bundle of joy, and my heart just aches for you that you don't have your mother. I think the only thing that you can really do is shower all of your love and affection on your son, and make sure to pass down some of your Mom's traditions to him so that he can know her through you.

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by mamajama on 26th March 2008
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  Thank you all so very much for your kind words, they are very much appreciated. I tell my son everyday about his special "Angel" in heaven and that's how he got his middle name. I make sure that the love I know she would have given him gets to him through me and my husband. I show him pictures of her everyday and tell him all about her.
  Thanks again.

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by Diane on 27th March 2008
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  I can identify Diane, I also lost my mom to breast cancer in 2005, and am a brand new mom this year (Jan 2008). It has been very hard at times with out my mom. My husband's mother is still living, however is in Norway. So it's hard to call her up for help when I need it. And my dad doesn't seem to remember how they did stuff when I was little, so he is of little help. At times I just feel like I'm barely treading water!

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by Katie on 11th June 2008
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  Hi Katie,
  I'm so sorry for your loss. I know it's very difficult. Congratulations on the new baby. My husband's parents are alive and living in the same state as us but are NO help at all. It's basically like they are not here so I know what you mean. Anytime you want to chat just e-mail me, I'm here for you.
  Diane

  Flag as inappropriate Posted by Diane on 12th June 2008