By calling up a no when you need it, you gain a bit of deserved time for yourself and, equally important, you prepare your child for the “real” world. Parental no’s teach children how to cope with disappointment, how to argue, how to strike a balance between work and play, time management, and task prioritization --essential experiences that aren’t always taught in school. When children grow up learning these concepts, they are more likely to be successful in their academics, relationships, and, later on, in their careers.
Getting Off the Yes-Treadmill: 10 Tips
1.) Don't make a habit of putting your children's wants and wishes before yours.
2.) Don’t say yes to avoid confrontation.
3.) Stop saying yes to keep up with other parents (or their children).
4.) Think about what’s really involved (more drive time, less study time, later bedtimes, the wrong crowd, etc.).
5.) Remember that most children readily bounce back from disappointment and move on.
6.) Understand that the appropriate use of saying no teaches important life lessons and skills.
7.) Saying NO helps instill your beliefs and values.
8.) Remember, it is your parental right to say no.
9.) Park your guilt. As adults, your children will find something other than your refusals to fault you for.
10.) Your children may even thank you for teaching them how to say no.
Adapted from The Book of NO: 250 Ways to Say It and Mean It.
3 comments so far...
Flag as inappropriate Posted by charliesaurus on 29th February 2008
Flag as inappropriate Posted by Susan Newman, Ph.D. on 27th February 2008
Flag as inappropriate Posted by Diane on 26th February 2008