Member Articles

When middle-aged women confront diminished opportunities and bleak futures, they often feel angry and betrayed. For those who remain married to a reliable breadwinner, the price they pay for opting out may be emotional and psychological. But for those who have lost their breadwinner to divorce or death, the practical consequences can be serious indeed.

For working mothers, on the other hand, middle age can be exciting and empowering. As our children get older they become more independent, which frees up a lot of time and energy we can devote to our own goals. Our careers are thriving, and we're reaping the benefits of having stayed the course, with higher earnings, more challenging responsibilities, and all the positive reinforcement that comes with success. Many of us feel we're at the peak of our own individual powers, and that can be a thrilling experience.

Last year, at the age of 57, I published my first book, The Feminine Mistake, which became a national best-seller. I've spent the past 12 months traveling all over the world, speaking and writing on the issues I care about deeply. I've never felt more excited about the opportunities that lie ahead. What a great reward for toughing it out through those stressful years when my children were small and the juggling act sometimes made me feel as though my head was going to implode! I'm so grateful that I kept working and that now, as my children leave the nest, my own prospects are expanding rather than diminishing.

REASON NUMBER FOUR: The Risks of Financial DependencyOur culture tends to smile approvingly on women who give up their individual goals and devote themselves to home and family. No one ever seems to talk about the longterm risks of economic dependency. But the truth is that most stay-at-home mothers are playing Russian roulette with their own futures -- and with those of their children. As one expert put it, "Marriage is an economic partnership, but it's one in which women assume nearly all the economic risk."