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So: What Don't YOU Do?

How to Stop the Super-Mommy Madness

by Jordan Sadler | 2783 views | 17 comments | Rate this now!

About the Author

Jordan is mom to two wonderful boys and owner of a speech-language pathology private practice in Chicago, IL.

17 comments so far...

I don't make beds.
I don't iron.
I don't bathe my child daily.
I don't watch TV.
I don't do yardwork.
I don't go "out on the town."
I shop online.
I don't exercise much, but I'm trying to change that.
I don't bake.
I don't scrapbook.
I don't make cards for birthdays or holidays. I buy them.
I don't garden.
I don't cut hair.
I don't make bread.
I don't wash diapers.
I didn't make my own babyfood.
I don't go to playdates.

I'm sure I could think of more.

Flag as inappropriate Posted by Mom2Rylie on 6th January 2009
Here we go again.

Why must we re-hash this topic over and over?

Bottom line: "It All" means different things to different people.

Women are working outside the home just as men are. The clock will never roll back on this one.

The expectations of a working parent (regardless of gender) are different from one that does not work and stays in the home.

Flag as inappropriate Posted by Uhura on 23rd January 2008
I don't usually make our bed. I don't have a spotless house. I don't hire someone to clean because we could not afford it. I don't always give my daughter a bath everyday. I don't cook every night-but I love to cook not because I want to live in the 50's-I just really enjoy it. I don't exercise daily and I have not been eating well. I didn't breastfeed-which comes with days of guilt from others. I don't always turn the tv off when we are playing-I will when she gets older. I could go on, but that is plenty.

Flag as inappropriate Posted by Christine on 15th October 2007
I do not clean. I do not bake. I do not make beds, okay sometimes if I feel like it. I do not get my nails done unless you count me nibbling on them when I'm nervous. I do not paint my toe nails except once per summer, then I let it chip off and it's gross. I hardly change diapers, my husband does that. I do not make my own coffee, in fact I do not know how. And I just hired a cleaning lady.

I love to cook, love to read to my son, love fun outings, love planning our travels, love my job. So, I do all those things and I think that makes up for it.

Flag as inappropriate Posted by jlauren on 19th September 2007
To be able to make a list, I would have to be conscious of what I am not doing, but I have been living my own way for so long I am oblivious to what the Ideal Mom does...hmmm. I don't have 3D women friends since they all moved to the suburbs, so no teas or gossip. I don't go with my husband to most of his social events. I don't clean (someone comes in twice a week). I don't iron (ditto). I don't make formal meals. I don't help my daughter with her homework (she is blessed to be a highly motivated, organized individual). I don't make the bed (my husband is fastidious). I don't take out the garbage. I don't argue. I don't overschedule my kid. I think boredom encourages creative thought.

Flag as inappropriate Posted by KatieK on 26th August 2007
I don't bathe my children every day. In fact if we're honest, my toddler is lucky if she gets three baths a week!
I don't clean, except for picking up before the cleaners come once every other week.
Before I was on maternity leave I didn't always pick up my daughter as soon as I was off work. Sometimes I took some time to myself.
And last but not least, I don't want to go back to my job in November. I'm ready for a change. ;-)

Flag as inappropriate Posted by kikarose on 17th August 2007
1. I don't shave under my arms in winter
2. I have dust bunnies under the bed that are bigger than the dog
3. I only mop the kitchen floor when my feet start sticking to it
4. I only brush the front of my kid's teeth because who sees the back
5. I will buy cheap toilet paper for the family so I can have expensive hairspray
6. I let my three-year-old watch Lifetime
7. The last time we gave to the poor was when we left that penny on the sidewalk
8. I told my kid if he goes poopy on the potty I will let Santa Claus move in downstairs
9. I make my coffee before I give him breakfast
10.I do read to my kid. He loves People and Glamour best

Flag as inappropriate Posted by Kelly Swanson on 16th August 2007
When I put it all together--not sure what I actually *do*!
I don't
clean my house or even pre-clean --I have a housekeeper
do any laundry --housekeeper does that
stay home--we have a nanny
cook elaborate gourmet meals anymore or even cook routinely--my husband isn't home much and the kids are still too young.
exercise every day. (sigh--that one I really miss)
read books for pleasure
travel to exotic places with my husband--the grocery store seems exotic these days.

I'm still working on the "it's okay" part.

Flag as inappropriate Posted by spacegeek on 16th August 2007
Jordan- this was very funny. Women do have these "50-esque" expectations don't they? We are liberated and then when Halloween rolls around we feel the urge to turn into "Becky Home-Ecky". What is with that?
I love your list. I love my cleaning woman, but I confess I am a bed maker- I have sons and I want them to helpful to their wives someday, so our rule is: They make their own beds daily (doesn't have to be perfect) and for my husband and I: Whoever is out of bed last, makes it. So even dad has to make it on weekends:) For me, a made bed makes the room look twenty times cleaner even if it's not so clean! (lately, I'm not always on top of "de-cluttering" for my cleaning woman)

Flag as inappropriate Posted by Rosanne Rust on 16th August 2007
Eerie...my list is almost identical to yours. My only deviation is that I try to make my bed because it the one thing I can do in less than a minute and it makes a huge impression on my everytime I walk to the bedroom! I also don't clean out my car (inside or out) but I keep a towel on the back seat under the car seats so if I have a real person riding with me, I can move the car seat and fold over the towel (and all those crumbs) to leave a relatively clean seat to sit on. I then throw everything under their feet to the other side of the car!

Flag as inappropriate Posted by PeggyM on 15th August 2007
Since I work full time (and then some), I try to focus on spending good, quality time with my son. That's mean I outsource a lot. If someone can do something better than me, I let them do it and don't feel bad about it. This way I spend my free time completely focused on my son instead of household duties. My nanny straightens up and does laundry when my son is sleeping, I have a housekeeping for deep cleaning -- floors, bathroooms, etc., my mother in law makes a lot of my son's food all fresh from her garden, I order groceries online, I had his birthday party partially catered.

Flag as inappropriate Posted by Dee Anna on 15th August 2007
Cleaning -- I pay someone to clean the toilets and wash the floors and do the scrubbing bubbles routine. I straighten and clean up the clutter so they can do their job more efficiently. I "should" let them take off in the summer when I'm not teaching, but they do a much better job than I would, so I still have them come in during July and August.

Flag as inappropriate Posted by Daisy on 15th August 2007