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I'm Annoyed

by Jeannie MacDonald  |  1077 views  |  4 comments  |        Rate this now! 

So my brain’s Annoyance Tolerator Chip crashed the other day. Since then, I’ve found myself irritated with…let’s see…just about everything!

Here’s my Top 10 list. Feel free to add yours in the “Comments” section.

 

RSVP Ignorers

Anyone who’s ever paid $100 a plate for wedding no-shows knows what I’m talking about. When asked a simple question (“Are you coming?”), an MIT doctorate in molecular genetics is not required. “Yes” or “No” will do. Some people view RSVPs as purely optional. I’m guessing they also consider death purely theoretical.

Weirdly Spelled First Names

Go ahead, give your kid a trendy name. Just don’t spell it in a way that resembles an eye chart, then get huffy when I need help spelling it. “That’s Mi-KAY-lah! M-Y-C-K-Z-E-A-Y-L-O-U-G-H. Naturally, the Z and G are silent.” (Naturally!)

Spotless Cars

The interior of my car looks like the contents of a shark’s stomach. Drive-by coffee spills. Goldfish crackers. Muffin crumbs. Dog hair. But whenever I get into the car of someone who keeps theirs pristine, I’m terrified they’ll go postal if I sneeze. It’s just transportation, not a dust-free lab at NASA, right?

The Cost of Cereal

Like Jerry Seinfeld, I love cereal. Actually, I love mixing cereals together (my drugs of choice: Total and Quaker’s 100% Natural). But the price? It’s like crack, with riboflavin. If tax dollars subsidize new NFL stadiums, why not Rice Krispies? I’m just sayin’…

Obnoxious Ringtones

Certain songs should proceed directly to that special wing in hell where Bad Tunes Go To Die. “Muskrat Love,” “Hollaback Girl,” “(Your Song Choice here!)”

Wine Descriptions

I wouldn’t know a “long, buttery finish” if it came up and bit my ear lobe off. I’m happy wine is capable of “honeyed quince and citrus flavors with fig and melon aromas.” Really I am. But here’s all I need to know: is it dry or sweet, fruity or not, served from a carafe or a cardboard box?

Overly Chummy Waiters

Rachel Forrest, our friend and local food critic, shares the same pet peeves as me (you, too?). I’m not wild about being addressed as “you guys.” Scooching down by my side to take my order? Not loving it. Being asked, “Are you still working on that?” like I’m a Neanderthal gnawing on the femur of a woolly mammoth? Could do without it.

About the Author

Jeannie MacDonald is a freelance writer, wife, and mother of one, who lives on the New Hampshire seacoast.

Read more by Jeannie MacDonald




4 comments so far...

  • I agree with all of your annoyances!
    One of mine is people who have cell phones and do not answer their phones. Why do you have a cell phone then?? Or when someone calls you and then leave a message and are like "Call me right back" so you do and they don't answer! Hello???
    And traffic that is my other pet peeve, I think they should pass a law where you have to put your cell phone number on your license plate so that you can call the person in front of you who won't get out the way and then you coule tell them to MOVE OUT OF THE WAY!

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by dixychick on 6th May 2007

  • Having just finished my morning commute, the thing that really burns my @$$ (besides a flame about 3 feet high) is people who cut me off in traffic. I think I am going to get one of those air horns...yeah, that would make me feel better. HOOOOOOOOOOOONK!!!!!!!!

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by GinnyG on 24th April 2007

  • I am crying from laughter and I'll tee up another: gym-grunters. Is all that noise *really* necessary?

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by maria on 23rd April 2007

  • Jeannie, this is hilarious!

    I'll add one: Close office talkers! There is a guy in our office who comes into other people's offices and literally goes behind their desk to stand right in front of them and talk to them. Ugh!

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by Nataly on 23rd April 2007

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