Member Articles

Write an article!

Training kids to be helpful

Start early (earlier than you think!)

by SisterWisdom.com  |  921 views  |  0 comments  |      Rate this now! 

Children -- very young children, especially -- will slow you down. That's OK. Instead of scurrying through housework while you have a few moments to yourself, complete it with their company and their assistance. You can afford to take longer at it that way. Then when you do have a few moments to yourself, you can take a break, write a letter, read a book, paint your nails.

Bring your children alongside.

Don't make yourself a slave to your children's schedule (or whims) of play, rest, food, etc. Instead set your own course, bring your children alongside, and teach them to be helpful. If they cannot help at everything you do (it is not always possible), you can still train them to be happy, patient, and not a hindrance.

Those times when your work is beyond their ability to help (computer work, for example), you can give them something specific to do right there beside you. You can also use some of those times to train them to occupy themselves happily in a designated area with specific boundaries. Have them play with toys you select and practice being quiet for at least some of that time; this is excellent training for having well-behaved children in church, meetings, restaurants, and other public places.

Think about what your children can do right now.

Think about what they are capable of with a little training. My 3-year-old mops the kitchen floor. She loves it. She gets to spray "bubbles" and then make them disappear. I took five minutes to train her. No, it's not perfectly done. Sometimes I have to go over a few spots again, get the corners a little better. But, even imperfectly, it is done. I can direct her as I sweep the hall, wash the dishes, fold the towels. She sees that she is saving me from having to do a job myself; she sees that her work is real and valuable, and this makes her realize that she is also valuable. She is not just a cute accessory; she is a valued, contributing member of the household.

Self-esteem from helpfulness.

Children want to know that they matter, that they add value, that they are important - even essential - to the household and the family. Abstractions don't teach this. Tangible proof does. "I mop the floor, so Mom doesn't have to," teaches that a child's contribution makes a real difference in a parent's life.

Think of that lesson as opposed to what they learn from seeing Mom stop her valuable work in order to pick up a child's mess, cajole a child into obeying, or placate a temper tantrum. That's where self-esteem issues start. Kids don't need self-esteem training if they learn, from daily work and daily life, how much they matter.

About the Author

Annie Mueller writes at SisterWisdom, where she helps women build a better life by offering info like the Get-Your-Life-Together plan and the free Moving Toward Simplicity ebook.

Read more by SisterWisdom.com

Leave a comment

0 comments so far...

No comments yet.

Have a question?

Check out our popular Q&A area to ask questions and search for answers.

Quick recipes

Check out our favorite quick and easy recipes, perfect for busy moms.

Affordable Luxuries Blog

Check out our daily picks for affordable luxuries for you and your family.

Subscribe to our Weekly Newsletter