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On a good night I get 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep. In a great-once-in-a-random-while night I get 7-8 hours of sleep. Most nights, I sleep for about 5 hours.
I know this isn’t enough and I don’t need any experts to tell me that. I am tired, a lot, my eyes burn, often, I need some type of caffeine to get through the day (tea, lately) and my lack of proper sleep combined with lots of other stuff (like, apparently, not breathing enough) is beginning to cause some health issues. On days when my sleep deficit is high I get less done and am less focused.
I have every reason to do it, so why don’t I prioritize getting more sleep?
This is a question I’ve been struggling with. Every once in a while I announce to my husband that this is going to be a good-sleep week — we’re going to get organized, get work and chores done early, and get to bed at a reasonable hour. In fact, I announced this on Sunday night. So far, my so-called sleep week is a complete failure. On Sunday night I said that I needed to stay up late to get more work done so that I could start the week off in a great way (I hate long to-do lists on Mondays). On Monday I said that I needed to stay up to catch up on work that I didn’t get done because of some site bugs I’d spent time fixing. Last night I actually went to sleep at 11, but got up this morning for my favorite spin class at 5:30am. (I only do this once a week and my body literally misses it if I skip out — my husband calls it my sick idea of “me” time.)
My father says that when he was my age he slept every other night. He is joking, of course, but he did stay up writing his dissertation after I went to bed because during the day he worked at his regular job; he slept for about 3-4 hours a night for many years. Some people just need less sleep.
But I am not my father and I know my body needs more sleep. I’ve been running a serious deficit since my daughter was born and even a worse deficit since I became an entrepreneur. I keep thinking that I am just going to do this for a bit longer and then catch up on sleep. I’ll build the company for the next few years, then thing will get easier, my daughter will get older, and I’ll catch up on sleep. I know that sounds naive, but I don’t know what I can drop from my current daily list to get a few extra ours of shut eye. I’m no super-mom, but both parts of the work-family juggle are really important to me.
I also know that I am not alone and that many working moms don’t get enough sleep. There was even an article in Redbook recently about all the reasons moms don’t sleep enough — and one thing I’ve learned is that I am not the only one coming up with great-sounding excuses for not sleeping.
What I wonder about is whether this is a reality we just have to deal with while our kids are young and we juggle so much? Or is it dangerous to deprive ourselves of something so vital to our health? Sound off, I’ve love to hear what you think!
This entry was posted on Wednesday, April 16th, 2008 at 7:37 am and is filed under Balancing Act, Your life.
Tags: busy moms, sleep, working moms
April 16th, 2008 at 8:12 am
I’ve always need 7-8 hours of sleep to function properly. Even before kids. It is very easy to stay up late when the kids are finally in bed but I try to keep in mind that I’ll be happy in the morning thatI turned in earlier. You know how you hate to start off Mondays with a long to do list? I hate to start of the week already in sleep deficit.
April 16th, 2008 at 8:54 am
My hat is off to you folks who can manage at any level on five hours of sleep. I would be completely shattered on that little. But I absolutely hear your point - that many working moms are chronically sleep-deprived. Is this just a reality we must deal with or should we change our ways? Well, I lean towards the get-more-sleep view, but I think it all depends on the person. Some people drive themselves harder than others and - hey - look what you have to show for all your work: WIM! I would suggest you find a way to get through during these toughest years. For example, could you take a good longish nap at lunchtime? That would make a huge difference, yet you could still get up early and stay up late to work etc. I read that LBJ used to do that and said it was like getting two work days out of one!
April 16th, 2008 at 8:55 am
Ya, sleeping for solid 8 hrs is good for our health. After the whole days work we need rest so that we can start off our next day happily. Even its a difficult time with the kids.
April 16th, 2008 at 10:25 am
I’m in the need sleep camp, and have to say it should be a priority. Do you *really* get more work done during those hours that you are too tired to function? Do you enjoy the time with your daughter when you are shattered from a long week of sleepless nights? Try sleeping a little extra each night and I bet you get more quality work done even if you feel you have less time in which to do it.
They say a happy mom is a good mom, but a healthy mom is even better!
April 16th, 2008 at 11:25 am
In a perfect world I require 8-9 hours of sleep! I figured this out after college. When I worked full time, was in school full time, belonged to too many groups and had a boyfriend. What sleep? Who needed sleep? Then I graduated and slept and realized WOW! THIS is what it is like to be rested! To have my full brain at my disposal! And vowed to never be that tired again. Then I had my son and have broken that promise! It is really, really hard to prioritize one thing over another. I have a rotating schedule, one day work wins, one day exercise, one day family, one day sleep, etc. ok sometimes I sacrifice two things for one - but really there are only 24 hours in a day and they are much more pleasant hours if 7 -8 of them are spent unconscious!
April 16th, 2008 at 4:11 pm
I get about the same amt of sleep as you and I find the days that I’ve had 7-8 hours, I work more efficiently. Soft pillows, sharp minds? Probably!
April 16th, 2008 at 4:50 pm
Oh boy! This is a struggle that I have been trying to get over-around-under-and-through for the past several months. Although I get such an amazing amount of work accomplished in the night hours after the kids are tucked away, I find that I’ve amped myself up so much as to make it absolutely impossible to fall asleep. I tried reading a little. All that happened was more ideas sparked and then I had to record them in order to explore further the next day. So I made a “chill out” mix for the iPod… nope. Okay… how about a hot bath? That’s working somewhat, but I’m starting to grow gills. Aaaarrrgghhh! I hope I can get eight hours in again some day.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:34 am
This is an issue that I spent alot of time playing with…kind of like when people play with fire. It is abundantly clear to me that I need at least 7 hours of sleep, 8-9 to be at my best. This is new for me (in the last 3 months) but I had to rethink some things and quit others. I quit a weekly teaching commitment, I said no to having family gatherings at our house for a while, I quit worrying about my house being the cleanest one on the block, and I quit making excuses and took my butt to bed at 10:00 no matter what! I regularly stop folding a basket of laundry or leave a few dirty dishes because at 10:00 I stop and go to bed. It’s not a perfect system, but it’s brought some of my sanity back!