I kill plants.

You think I’m exaggerating, but believe me, I am not. I have killed cacti by sheer neglect. Just tonight I remembered that the cute Peter Rabbit pot on my 4-year-old’s bookshelf contained an African Violet that I put there eight months ago and hadn’t thought about since. (It did not survive.) When we first moved into our house, I was helping my husband plant tulip bulbs when he stopped me and said, “Hey, you know, the pointy ends GO UP.”
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One of the things that has really shocked me about the state of the economy in general and my company in particular is that when people ask me if things are really as bad as they say on the news, and I say, “Well, yes,” they say, cheerfully, “Well, at least you have your husband’s salary to fall back on.”

It’s as if, in spite of everything, the concept of a breadwinning mom is still unfathomable.
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We’ve all heard about Murphy’s Law (whatever can go wrong, will). And the Law of Averages (everything evens out in the end). And Newton’s Third Law of Motion (every action has an equal and opposite reaction).

Well, The Laws of Working Moms incorporate a little bit of each — and then some.
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One of the more demoralizing aspects of the economic downturn is feeling like, even if you haven’t been laid off or had your salary slashed, you’re probably pretty expendable. So the impact negative criticism can have on your job performance — and your ego — is often magnified. Small slights carry more weight, and a poor performance review can seem insurmountable.

But it’s important to learn from criticism, even the negative kind. Granted, some things — like office gossip, for example — are detrimental no matter how you dice it. But, for the most part, there are ways to glean the positive out of the negative.  These tips work whether the person on your case is your boss, your co-worker, or even your teenager (yes, it’s true: Parenting takes people skills).
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I think that one of the reasons my own work-life balance is so awful is that my husband’s is nearly nonexistent. He has a demanding job, at the same company at which I work; and he’s a journalist, same as me — which means we’re both facing with the same industry meltdown and accompanying stress. But he’s dealing with a wrinkle that I don’t: As a man, no one really expects him to be struggling with work-life balance.
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It’s no secret that working moms are under a great deal of pressure. Our own Work It, Mom! survey of 400 breadwinning working mothers found that 73 percent worked full-time outside the home, and 68 percent found it stressful — with many becoming resentful of having to support their households.

The recession isn’t making it any easier. Several surveys have come out recently, trying to gauge the effect the economy has had on work-life balance in general, and working mothers in particular. As you’ve probably guessed, the results aren’t pretty.

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One year, my kids paraded into my room on my birthday, bearing gifts and breakfast. Granted, the toast had been nibbled on as the tray came up the stairs, the eggs were like concrete, and one of my children assured me that my coffee was “cold enough to drink” by dipping his entire hand into the cup and sloshing it around. They were so proud of their efforts, though, that I ate every bite while they opened my presents for me — and it was the best breakfast I ever had.

Mother’s Day is this Sunday. Here’s a morning menu that your kids can make themselves — with some grownup supervision, of course. Print it out and leave it on the counter where your partner and kids can see it. Maybe they’ll take the hint!
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Bedtime with my kids is one of the things I look forward to — most days, I mean. I’m no angel, frankly, and neither are they, but when quality time is at a premium (and which working parent’s isn’t?) those last few minutes of the day, when they’re sweet and sleepy in footie pajamas, are what I look forward to. We crack open a few books — my 4-year-old recites her favorites while diligently and seriously pointing to the wrong words — and settle in for a pre-bed cuddle.

So I was surprised to read about a recent survey that found that three-quarters of British parents were too busy — or too tired — to read to their young kids at bedtime.
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