I had a housework-related epiphany of sorts the other day, and realised two things:

1.) My well-documented tendency to clutter isn’t about hording but about time management. A gut-wrenching first-person story about hoarding, written by my friend and former colleague Mike Rosenwald for the Washington Post Magazine, made this clear to me: It’s not that I can’t bear to part with things, or feel a need to own multiples of things, but that I feel like I don’t have time to sort through it all and so I save it until such time that I do. And, let’s face it: All working moms know that huge chunk of free time isn’t coming soon, no matter what the researchers say. So I might as well get to it.

2.) The biggest thing preventing me from clearing out the clutter was the fact that our storage areas are already full of stuff I probably don’t need to keep anymore. And I need to empty them out before my husband has a cleaning tantrum and does it for me.
Read the rest of this entry

A newly released Boston College study called “The New Dad: Exploring Fatherhood Within a Career Context” indicates that the times are a-changing, at least in the workplace: Modern fathers may be dealing with a problem similar to that which working mothers know all too well.

“Men are facing the same clash of social ideals that women have faced since the 1970s — how do you be a good parent and a good worker?” Joan C. Williams, the director of the Center for WorkLife Law at the Hastings College of the Law at the University of California, told the New York Times in a piece published on Sunday (which was Father’s Day, natch). “This is a pretty sensitive indicator of the rise of the new ideal of the good father as a nurturing father, not just a provider father.”

That ideal, however, doesn’t necessarily extend into the office. For the most part, it’s still assumed that if a sick child needs to be picked up, the mother’s going to be the one to do it, and if the dad has to work late, mom’s there to pick up the slack at home. Which makes me think that maybe we need to stop talking about work-life balance and start thinking up ways employers can make things more equitable for all working parents, male and female.
Read the rest of this entry

This year for Father’s Day, my husband told me that all he wanted was a day in which to do the things he wanted to do, as opposed to all of the things he had to do. Happily, these want-to-do things include planting the garden, spreading wood chips, trimming hedges, and watching as much World Cup soccer as he can without having to change over to The Mickey Mouse Clubhouse or SpongeBob SquarePants.  So it was super-easy to get him exactly what he wanted.

(Personally, I think that single moms should give themselves a little something on Father’s Day, whether their kid’s dad is in the picture or not. Ditto for single dads and Mother’s Day. You fly solo, you get both days.)

But if the day snuck up on you this year, as Easter did with me, and your partner prefers something from which he can tear off the wrappings, a good book makes a great gift. Here are five that might mysteriously appear on my spouse’s nightstand:
Read the rest of this entry

I finally got around to watching Iron Man (crazy schedules + expensive babysitters = two working parents who don’t get to the movies all that often). And I loved it.

I have a thing for superheroes in general — my childhood idol was Mighty Mouse, in fact, and I’ve passed my love of The X-Men on to my kids. But Iron Man appealed to me even more than super hero movies usually do, not because some otherworldly avenger/defender swoops in to save the day, but because Tony Stark creates his own superpower.
Read the rest of this entry

I was reading a story about eco-friendly finishes for new homes when I was suddenly struck by the ridiculousness of it all. How is gold-gilded bamboo flooring still eco-friendly? What’s environmentally conscious about spending $125 for a single roll of wall paper made from old newspapers? (Really. I’m not kidding.)

There’s a huge difference between going green and, well, going “green.”
Read the rest of this entry

When I got home from work yesterday, my 5- and 3-year-olds were riding their scooters in front of our house. They immediately headed for the grass when they saw my car approaching (Yay! They were listening when I told them to do that!) and then, when they recognized that it was me, they started jumping up and down, too excited to wait for me to pull in to the driveway. Even with the windows up and the music on I could hear them yelling, “Mama! Mama’s home!” My husband — home sick that day, poor guy — was sitting on the stoop, watching them, watching me, and smiling.

That has got to be one of the best feelings in the world.
Read the rest of this entry