The 36-Hour Day
with Amy Urquhart
I’m Amy and I’ve spent the last three years trying to strike that perfect balance between being a wife, mom and professional career woman. I’ve decided that I’ll never perfect the art of “having it all”, but this blog is a chronicle of my attempts to continue to do so. I’m a blogger (my personal blog about Canadian home life is Hearts into Home), gardener, college instructor, wife to Graham and mom to Nate. If you’re also a working mom who finds there just aren’t enough hours in the day, I hope you’ll enjoy this column!
Read her blog at Hearts into Home.
|
Scrolling through my Facebook feed, chatting with my local friends via text, talking to family members on the phone, I’m a bit surprised by the number of people I know who are planning or taking vacations right now. I hate to admit it, but I have to admit it: I’m a little jealous. Or, possibly, a lot. Where do so many people find the time and the money for a proper vacation?
Part of it must have to do with prioritization—we tend to make time and/or resources available for the thing that are most important to us—but part of it, I think, has to do with expectations.
Growing up, my family didn’t vacation. We just didn’t. That’s not to say we didn’t travel—you can’t not travel when your parents are from countries other than the one in which you currently live. But our vacation time was spent driving or flying to see family, not going camping or cruising or paying homage to Disney.
So, as an adult, when I finished college and was gainfully employed and living on my own, I did what I knew. I accumulated vacation time and spent it visiting family, sometimes driving a few states away, sometimes flying to another continent. And spent my time with people I loved and it was always interesting and I was always glad I went, but I thought it was normal to come back from vacation feeling more burned out than when you left.
Yesterday, I drove to a beach town in my state to hang out with one of my dearest friends. My kids played with hers in the sand while I sat in her vacation rental and worked. I joined them in the sun later, and we went out to dinner, and I swear it was the most relaxing day I’ve had in at least a year, in spite of the work I had to do while I was there.
Is vacation—real, honest-to-goodness relaxing vacation—a priority for your family? What do you do, where do you go, and, in this economy, how do you make it work with your budget?
Subscribe to blog via RSS
Yes. We make vacations a priority. With family in another state, we spent many years traveling only to see them with our time off. While this is valuable, and important, I came to realize it was not recreational.
Our solution has been to be sure to attach a couple of days of real vacation onto the end of our family visits… or, in between if need-be.
For example, on our trek to the south, we chose to take the drive, instead of fly, and get a hotel night on the way. (It is a two day trip via car.) We get the hotel pool and a family game night, and breakfast on the way out the next AM… relaxing. Then, at the end of the trip, we take a three-day sideline to another state to take a real vacation before heading home. You’ve already footed the travel bill, the only cost is a few nights hotel and cutting down on family time. (In our family 3 days with in-laws is enough anyway, don’t need a week). Usually, for us this means a few days in the TN mountains after visiting family in the Carolinas. ( For others, if budget is a worry, why not take day trips while staying with family to save on hotels?)
In more recent years, we have made it another priority to take “real” vacations. My thinking is that the globe is a two-way road… why should all the trips be on our time and our tab? Now we take a once yearly trip south, instead of the twice-yearly it used to be, and we encourage southern family to come see us. With this new arrangement we have managed to take a trip to Europe, and Canada, (with kids) among other worthwhile and memorable travels all while getting to show the sights and sounds of our home-side tourism to family when they come see us. Hubbie only gets a cpl weeks a year, so we want to use them wisely.
One last thought, when budget is a concern… remember that even a day trip is needed relaxation. Your neighboring states (right there in your own backyard) surely offer affordable and exciting leisure activities… just visit your nearby state’s tourism websites for weekend and day trip ideas. Every state has something to offer! Make it a stay-cation.
Another thought, some parents travel for business.. what a great way to take a cheap trip with kids. Part of the travel cost and all of the hotel is already covered… we do this routinely.
Lastly, travel does not have to be expensive. Renting an vacation home or hotel suite can be cheap enough if shared with another family… there are websites that offer “trades” (you go to CA, a Ca family comes to your home). While I have not personally done either of these options, I know plenty of families have.
MOMofthree | August 30th, 2011 at 2:57 am
We pretty much vacation with family. Though for a few years my mother came to see us and we drove areas around here we otherwise wouldn’t have visited. We’ve gone back for mini-vacations to one of those spots since.
For the most part, as a single mom, vacation, isn’t. It is dealing with all the issues and challenges, and having fewer of the creature comforts while we do.
Mich | August 30th, 2011 at 3:16 pm
Yes. I actually have a vacation budget. I put X amount per paycheck automatically into this vacation fund (online ING checking account). We use these funds to vacation, pay for food/activities while on vacation and anything while we are gone. We typically take 1-2 vacations a year. This is the only thing that keeps us sane. I CRAVE vacations. I love the beach, love time with my husband and boys, and literally count the days between each one. Some vacations are more frugal than others, and believe me, each vacation total (travel, lodging, food, activities, etc) is usually under $1,000.
Natalie | September 1st, 2011 at 5:02 pm
There are plenty of ways to vacation on a budget. Disney is overpriced and overrated, although you can even do Disney on the cheap if you work a little - they often run specials with free dining plans, for example.
If you love the beach, the Outer Banks of NC are way more affordable (and less crowded) than anything around New England. It’s a 12 hour drive, but well worth it - you can get a weeklong rental directly on the beach, sleeping 10, with a hot tub, washer dryer, etc. for about $1500. If you’re willing to walk a block to the beach, it’s even cheaper, and the beaches there are gorgeous and totally uncrowded.
We have a sailboat (30 years old, but new to us, nothing fancy or luxurious), so even just going out for the day is a great break. DH and the kids have lived on it for up to a week, I haven’t had the time off to join them but hope to next year. Vacations on the boat are pretty much free- we don’t generally use more than a couple of gallons of fuel, we cook our own meals, and we generally drop anchor instead of paying for a mooring or slip. We’ve been to Plymouth, Falmouth, Provincetown, Newburyport, and Isles of Shoals. Next year we hope to sail to Maine.
akmom | September 5th, 2011 at 5:04 pm