My husband regularly works long hours and even pulls all-nighters in order to clear his plate at the office. I used to, too — before a pay cut made me take a second look at how much my time was worth.

Sure, hard work always pays off, as the saying goes. It just seems like sometimes it pays a lot less than it used to. When the work piles up and I can’t get it done during the work day, instead of automatically bringing it home with me I find myself calculating the dwindling dollars and cents of my hourly wage and deciding that I’m more than willing to do it on company time, for pay, but not at home, for free.
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Now that Halloween is over, I want to get rid of the metric ton of candy sitting in my house. I could bring it in to the office, but if I can’t resist the siren’s song of the fun-size Snickers bar in my pantry, how can I turn my back on it when it’s sitting there, in plain sight, next to my desk? Besides, I left the candy at home this morning by accident, and my coworkers have already filled our corner of the office with tiny bars of every candy ever invented. To bring in more would be overkill.

But not if I’ve magically transformed them into something else first.
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I noticed recently that when there’s something on my to-do list that I really want to avoid, I start searching for something else — anything else — to do instead. Sometimes that means I end up baking banana bread at 2 in the morning. Sometimes I discover an awesome new blog. Sometimes I end up surfing my favorite time-wasters on the web. But most of the time, that search for a distraction brings me right back to my to-do list, and I end up knocking tons of little line items off and being productive in spite of myself.
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Let’s face it: Whether you get the flu shot or not, and whether you’re worried about H1N1 (a.k.a. Swine Flu) or not, chances are you and your kids are going to be facing some flu-like symptoms this season.

Why? Well, even if you’ve gotten the vaccine, it can take as long as two weeks for your body to produce enough antibodies to protect you, according to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention. And the flu shot only protects against flu — if you catch one of the many, many non-influenza viruses out there, you can exhibit miserable flu-like symptoms but not actually have the flu.

This isn’t a post about whether or not to get the flu shot. (Want to discuss that anyway? You’re in luck — this one is!). But if you’re looking for a drug-free way to ease the misery at home, regardless of the state of your immunizations, check out these options:
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I was working from home, playing “beat the clock” with my to-do list, doggedly trying to get as much done as possible before I had to pick my youngest kids up from school and take them to karate. With my connection to my office up in one window, a layout program up in another, iTunes loaded in the background, and Firefox humming with five or six tabs open at the same time, my shiny, blessed laptop suddenly displayed the whirling rainbow circle — the Mac equivalent of a PC’s hourglass. And it would not go away.
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We often talk about how technology has made parenting more difficult: 10-year-olds who demand their own $300 cell phones, teens and huge text-messaging charges, sexting, Facebook and online privacy issues, cyberbullying… the list goes on and on.

What you don’t hear or read as much about is how technology has helped those of us who have to parent from a distance.
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If you’re not happy right now, take heart: You’re not alone.

According to the newest data from the United States General Social Survey, women today are less happy then they were back in 1972. Moreover, the survey found, women today become increasingly unhappy as they age compared to men, whose happiness levels trended upward as they got older.

It would be easy to dismiss it as another All-Is-Crap-With-The-Economy statistic if not for the fact that the General Social Survey has been asking the same question — “How happy are you, on a scale of 1 to 3, with 3 being very happy, and 1 being not too happy?”– to 1,500 men and women, of all ages, income levels, educational backgrounds, and marital statuses since 1972. And that the survey’s findings jibe with the results of six other major, long-term happiness studies around the world — more than 1.3 million men and women surveyed over the last 40 years, and in every study, the greater the opportunities women have the less happy they are over time, as compared to men.

But you know what? I think you have to choose to be happy. And that being able to consider personal happiness is a privilege afforded to those for whom the basic necessities — food, clothing, shelter — aren’t an issue. And that surveys, even ones as broad and as far-reaching as these, are still full of holes.
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I have a thing for inspirational quotes. It started back when I was in high school, I think — in the yearbook, seniors each got an entire page to do with as they liked, and it was traditional to include at least one, usually several, quotes. So I started collecting them in a little fabric-covered book, which I still have. I filled that book, started a second one, and then just kept jotting them down on random post-it notes and scraps of paper. Eventually, when I got an email address in the 1990s, I started collecting them in a folder online.

I came upon a stash of those little scraps of paper while trying to declutter my house, and all decluttering ground to a halt while I re-read these snippets of inspiration. Some are long, like The Desiderata by Max Ehrmann (which begins “Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence” and offers up wisdom in every line), but others are short and sweet.
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It’s hard enough to get going some mornings, but even if you have only one child to check up on, and even if your mornings are a piece of cake, there’s still homework, projects, extra curricular activities, household chores, and bedtime to deal with. Ideally, you want your kids to eventually take responsibility for these things themselves, but until then, how do you stay on top of it all? Especially given that you need to get yourself ready and out the door, often at the same time?
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West Indian Girl singer Mariqueen Maandig is giving up her gig to marry Nine Inch Nails front man Trent Reznor, her bandmates declared in August. WWE announcer Lilian Garcia announced her retirement Monday after 10 years with the WWE Divas, trading the wrestling ring for a wedding ring. And over at the StarTribune.com, a reader tells columnist Carolyn Hax to put marriage before career because “it really wasn’t worth all the sacrifices.”

Which made me wonder: If you couldn’t have both — and if finances weren’t an issue — which one would you choose?

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