Viewing category ‘Working? Living?’

The 36-Hour Day

with Lylah M. Alphonse

I'm a full-time editor, a part-time writer, and a mom and stepmom to five amazing kids, ages 1 to 14. For me it's not about finding balance, it's about the daily juggle-- my career, my commute, freelance work, homework, housework, married life, social life, and parenting-- and finding the time to get it all done.

To learn more about Lylah, check out her Work It, Mom! profile and read her blog at writeeditrepeat.blogspot.com.

Opportunity is knocking. Answer the door already!

Categories: Career, Hacking Life, The Juggle, Uncategorized, Working? Living?

3 Comments

I recently decided that I was going to consider every single career opportunity that came my way. Even the ones that I knew I couldn’t manage would get a closer look, just in case it turned out that there was some way for me to glean some good out of it.

I don’t know if it’s a case of The Law of Attraction or what, but now that my eyes are open, the opportunities are everywhere.
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How do you unwind?

Categories: Hacking Life, Making Time, Uncategorized, Working? Living?

5 Comments

I usually gripe about not having the wherewithal to exercise, to sleep, to make time for myself. Turns out I’m not alone.

According to a recent survey by the American Psychological Association, 75 percent of adults reported experiencing “moderate to high levels of stress” in the past month, and 42 percent said that their stress levels have increased in the past year. And more and more people don’t feel like they have the energy to deal with it.
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I am not a “Little Lady”

Categories: Hacking Life, The Juggle, Uncategorized, Working? Living?

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When I was looking to buy my first car, nearly 15 years ago, I was just a year out of college and thought I knew everything. I especially thought I was on firm footing when it came to cars, since I had just spent two years editing automotive stories in upstate New York. I did my research, took several test drives, knew what I wanted, knew how much the car — a sleek Nissan Altima — had cost the local dealer, knew how much it should cost me.

Even though I’m a feminist by default, on some level I must also have known that it would be a struggle to be taken seriously, because I brought a male friend along with me. He did not know anything about cars, aside from the fact that you put gas in and they go. He had never bought a car before, and wasn’t interested in buying one. He agreed to come with me mostly because he had nothing else to do that day.

I’m sure you can guess what happened.
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Is it ever OK to work for free?

Categories: Career, Hacking Life, Working? Living?

11 Comments

My husband regularly works long hours and even pulls all-nighters in order to clear his plate at the office. I used to, too — before a pay cut made me take a second look at how much my time was worth.

Sure, hard work always pays off, as the saying goes. It just seems like sometimes it pays a lot less than it used to. When the work piles up and I can’t get it done during the work day, instead of automatically bringing it home with me I find myself calculating the dwindling dollars and cents of my hourly wage and deciding that I’m more than willing to do it on company time, for pay, but not at home, for free.
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New study: Working moms raise unhealthy kids?

Categories: Parenting, The Juggle, Uncategorized, Working? Living?

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I had to take a couple of deep breaths in order to get past the first paragraph of this BBC News story: “Children whose mothers work are less likely to lead healthy lives than those with ’stay at home’ mothers, a study says.”

The study by the UCL Institute of Child Heath (ICH) focused on the families of 12,500 5-year-olds; the same children took part in an earlier study which found that those with working mothers were more likely to be obese or overweight by the age of 3.

So, let me get this straight: The new study “discovered” that the same kids who were likely to be obese or overweight by the age of 3 were also less likely to lead healthy lives at age 5? And that it’s all mom’s fault for working outside the home?

Sorry, BBC and ICH. I’m calling foul on this one.


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My computer died. Long live work-life balance!

Categories: Hacking Life, The Juggle, Uncategorized, Working? Living?

4 Comments

I was working from home, playing “beat the clock” with my to-do list, doggedly trying to get as much done as possible before I had to pick my youngest kids up from school and take them to karate. With my connection to my office up in one window, a layout program up in another, iTunes loaded in the background, and Firefox humming with five or six tabs open at the same time, my shiny, blessed laptop suddenly displayed the whirling rainbow circle — the Mac equivalent of a PC’s hourglass. And it would not go away.
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Are women choosing not to be happy?

Categories: Career, Hacking Life, Uncategorized, Working? Living?

10 Comments

If you’re not happy right now, take heart: You’re not alone.

According to the newest data from the United States General Social Survey, women today are less happy then they were back in 1972. Moreover, the survey found, women today become increasingly unhappy as they age compared to men, whose happiness levels trended upward as they got older.

It would be easy to dismiss it as another All-Is-Crap-With-The-Economy statistic if not for the fact that the General Social Survey has been asking the same question — “How happy are you, on a scale of 1 to 3, with 3 being very happy, and 1 being not too happy?”– to 1,500 men and women, of all ages, income levels, educational backgrounds, and marital statuses since 1972. And that the survey’s findings jibe with the results of six other major, long-term happiness studies around the world — more than 1.3 million men and women surveyed over the last 40 years, and in every study, the greater the opportunities women have the less happy they are over time, as compared to men.

But you know what? I think you have to choose to be happy. And that being able to consider personal happiness is a privilege afforded to those for whom the basic necessities — food, clothing, shelter — aren’t an issue. And that surveys, even ones as broad and as far-reaching as these, are still full of holes.
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A little inspiration works wonders

Categories: Hacking Life, The Juggle, Working? Living?

5 Comments

I have a thing for inspirational quotes. It started back when I was in high school, I think — in the yearbook, seniors each got an entire page to do with as they liked, and it was traditional to include at least one, usually several, quotes. So I started collecting them in a little fabric-covered book, which I still have. I filled that book, started a second one, and then just kept jotting them down on random post-it notes and scraps of paper. Eventually, when I got an email address in the 1990s, I started collecting them in a folder online.

I came upon a stash of those little scraps of paper while trying to declutter my house, and all decluttering ground to a halt while I re-read these snippets of inspiration. Some are long, like The Desiderata by Max Ehrmann (which begins “Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence” and offers up wisdom in every line), but others are short and sweet.
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Would you leave your career for your marriage?

Categories: Career, Hacking Life, The Juggle, Working? Living?

6 Comments

West Indian Girl singer Mariqueen Maandig is giving up her gig to marry Nine Inch Nails front man Trent Reznor, her bandmates declared in August. WWE announcer Lilian Garcia announced her retirement Monday after 10 years with the WWE Divas, trading the wrestling ring for a wedding ring. And over at the StarTribune.com, a reader tells columnist Carolyn Hax to put marriage before career because “it really wasn’t worth all the sacrifices.”

Which made me wonder: If you couldn’t have both — and if finances weren’t an issue — which one would you choose?


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It’s not a guilt thing. Except that it kind of is

Categories: Hacking Life, Making Time, The Juggle, Working? Living?

7 Comments

I went in to work crazy-early yesterday, so that I could leave crazy-early and meet up with an old friend whom I hadn’t seen in far too long. A coworker stopped by my desk as I was packing up, and so I explained what was going on.

She gasped. “You’re… actually doing something FOR YOURSELF?”

I immediately felt a little guilty. And sheepish. Until I looked her in the eye and saw that she was actually cheering me on.
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