Many women are blindsided by the realities of stepmotherhood, and resentment and frustration over blended family issues and responsibilities can have an adverse effect on one’s marriage and one’s health (according to US Census data, between 60 and 70 percent of second marriages end in divorce). In her new book, The Happy Stepmother, Dr. Rachelle Katz addresses the common causes, complaints, and concerns voiced by many stepmothers on her website, Steps For Step Mothers, and offers up 10 steps that women can take to stay sane, find support, and thrive in their blended families. A psychotherapist, Katz shares parts of her own stepmothering story in the book. Here’s one poignant lesson: “I had to accept the possibility that, despite all my best efforts, my stepdaughter might grow to dislike me because of what her mother said about me, rather than loving me as a thoughtful and generous stepmother,” she confesses. “I was sad that I had so little control over a relationship that mattered so much to me, but I understand that not having control was also a fact in many other aspects of life.” Her solution? “I made a conscious choice to focus on what I could control and to live in the present, rather than worrying about what might, or might not, occur in the future.” Sage advice.
$15.95 at Amazon.