with Angella Dykstra
I'm a mom of three, a professional accountant, and an amateur photographer and writer. I am not a marriage expert. But my husband and I take "Til death do us part" seriously, and here I'll be sharing how we keep our marriage strong while we both do that insane work-life juggle.
Check out my Work It, Mom! profile and my blog, Dutch Blitz.
This will probably come as no surprise to anyone who knows me even a little bit: I am a social being. I took one of those quizzes once and it told me that I was an introverted extrovert. That sums me up pretty perfectly. I do need my down time and feel the most balanced if I have quiet time to read and to write and to just recharge.
On the other hand, if I am at a social gathering I become entirely energized and lose all track of time while I sit and chat with with friends of mine. I look forward to these times of connecting, so much so that I go on regular girls’ night and usually take a few solo trips a year to spend time with these people whom I hold close to my heart.
Yes, I take solo trips. Without my husband or my children. It’s not that I don’t want my husband to join me; I ask him every single time if he wants to come along. His reply is usually involves a “hell to the no” and he will often mention something along the lines of, “Sticking a fork in my eyeball would be much more enjoyable.”
It’s not that he’s an anti-social person; he just isn’t overly social. We have a few couples who we are close friends with and enjoy the times we manage to get together, with our without our collective gaggle of children. He and the guys spend days snowmobiling in the winter and ATV-ing in the summer, but it doesn’t happen on a regular basis.
As soon as any mention of a “party” or “company” or any kind of large social function, he gets this pinched look on his face that is a little different than the one he gets when he has to drop a load. He loves our friends and family, but while I get a charge from spending times with people, he is exactly the opposite. He’d rather do a small gathering (once in awhile) and he apart from that is happy to putter out in his shop or trek out into the middle of nowhere with a fishing rod.
If he balked at even hanging out with our close friends, I’d likely have an issue with this difference in our personalities. As it is, I respect his need for alone time and he respects my need for interaction.
How about you? Are you the more social one, or is it your spouse who craves the crowd?
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