Committed: The Ties that Bond
with Angella Dykstra
I'm a mom of three, a professional accountant, and an amateur photographer and writer. I am not a marriage expert. But my husband and I take "Til death do us part" seriously, and here I'll be sharing how we keep our marriage strong while we both do that insane work-life juggle.
Check out my Work It, Mom! profile and my blog, Dutch Blitz.
Unless you’ve been living under a rock (If so, how is that working for you?) you have heard that Tiger Woods has had multiple affairs. This all came to light when the news reported his minor vehicle accident after his wife had chased him out of the house while swinging golf clubs. (Ironic, yes.)
I was not at all surprised at all by the story as I’ve always viewed Tiger as the kind of guy who might play the field a little. Or a lot. I didn’t pay a whole lot of attention to the story because, meh. It’s Tiger.
Then I read this post by Maria which made me sit up and think about the whole situation is a whole new light. What if the situation was reversed? What if it was Tiger’s wife who had cheated and he was chasing her with a golf club? Would everyone be joking about it?
Talk about a wake-up call. Women are always fighting for equal rights, but how does that work when it comes to domestic violence? We’re all ready to string up any guy who raises a hand to his girl, but what about the other way around?
What do you think? Is it OK to hit your husband?
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No, it’s not OK to hit your husband, but that isn’t all there is to it. If a woman loses control and whacks a man across the face, she has a lot less chance of doing significant damage than the other way around. A man can very easily break a woman’s jaw and so on. Therefore I have no problem teaching boys that no matter what, they must never hit a girl or woman. Not even in retaliation for being hit. Of course I teach both genders that hitting is wrong, but for boys I go a step further and present it as a matter of honor, of manliness.
Obviously, the ideal is that both women and men develop the ability to think of non-violent ways of dealing with their anger. But the reality is, many women and men aren’t quite there yet.
Now, maybe being whacked with a golf club was the best thing that could have happened to Tiger. I don’t know. Time will tell.
SKL | December 15th, 2009 at 2:02 pm
I might have been more sanguine about it but, golf clubs! You can do some serious damage, even women can kill with an instrument like that. This wasn’t she slapped him a few times.
In my neck of the woods the women who took what many would consider just revenge; gluing his “you know what” to his stomach, were charged. They tried to make it go away but I think the prosecutors were right; everyone was happy they took pleas (no jail time) but it sent the message that it is still wrong, no matter what he did.
Teach boys its never ok to hit girls; sure, but if she comes after him with a baseball bat, he’s got the right to do what he needs to in disarming her.
Mich | December 15th, 2009 at 6:54 pm
“What if it was Tiger’s wife who had cheated and he was chasing her with a golf club? Would everyone be joking about it?”
No way, Tiger would be vilified and sent to jail.
So, I don’t think its OK. However I do think a man or woman has a right to defend themselves against attack.
I try to teach both kids (a boy and agirl) that its not OK to hit, at all.
monstergirlee | December 16th, 2009 at 12:03 pm
It is absolutely okay for a woman to beat the crap out of her husband. Especially if he’s a cheater. Men have no right to hit their wives no matter what the situation. Men always deserve to be hit.
Jennifer | September 29th, 2011 at 9:14 am