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Committed: The Ties that Bond

with Angella Dykstra

I'm a mom of three, a professional accountant, and an amateur photographer and writer. I am not a marriage expert. But my husband and I take "Til death do us part" seriously, and here I'll be sharing how we keep our marriage strong while we both do that insane work-life juggle.

Check out my Work It, Mom! profile and my blog, Dutch Blitz.

You do what you love

Categories: communication, love


I’ve heard the phrase, “You do what you love” a number of times and have written about it on my personal site once or twice. It’s something that I quote often because it is true. If you really want to do something, you get it done. Everything else falls by the wayside. Why am I bringing it up today? LET ME TELL YOU.

I have mentioned before that my husband is pretty much the most amazing man on Earth. I’m sorry, but it’s true. But even superheroes have their flaws. Wait. Let me backtrack.

A few years ago I found myself staring at a number of options and was trying to figure out how to do them all. He sat me down and told me that I needed to choose because everything I touched turned to gold. I was offended because I thought he was holding me back, but he clarified. How could telling me that everything I touched turned to gold offend me? He was not holding me back - he was just reeling me in.

We came to the same discussion last night where I sat him down and said that maybe he had too many things on his plate. He is a smart, handy and gifted dude. He has a job, balances the kids while I’m at work and even does all of the baking that is eaten in this house (never mind the groceries that he buys and the dinners that he cooks during the work week). He also tends the garden, maintains anything that breaks in the house and builds every piece of household furniture that we own.

I won’t get into the minute details, but if you read the last paragraph you can see that *maybe* he needs to scale back a bit. There are things that he says he wants to do but four years later I can see that other things have higher priority. This is OKAY. I’m just trying to get him to see that he can let some stuff go.

How does it work in your relationship? Do you try to reel each other in or do you let the other one fly, even if it drives you crazy?

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2 comments so far...

  • Right now we’re currently letting each other fly and it is driving us both crazy. We’re going to get through August to fulfil the obligations we’ve made to others and then we’re going to sit down and figure out a compromise. We see each too rarely right now - it’s getting a bit ridiculous.

    hillary  |  July 27th, 2010 at 12:41 pm

  • My man is always thinking, dreaming, scheming on how to make life easier, simpler for us. Always looking for ways to match-make our single friends. Always on the lookout for a safe, smart way to earn more money - either for the long term or just to boost the family account. I often roll my eyes and groan as it’s yet another plan that might never see the light of day. However. He got super duper smart this time and entered a contest. Thursday morning he’ll be on live local tv vying to win $500 - $2000. When asked what he would do with the money, he said he’d build a playhouse for his boys. They’re invited to the show too. I think I’ll put up with all his wild endeavours for a while longer yet. :)

    rachel joy  |  July 27th, 2010 at 5:39 pm