Committed: The Ties that Bond
with Angella Dykstra
I'm a mom of three, a professional accountant, and an amateur photographer and writer. I am not a marriage expert. But my husband and I take "Til death do us part" seriously, and here I'll be sharing how we keep our marriage strong while we both do that insane work-life juggle.
Check out my Work It, Mom! profile and my blog, Dutch Blitz.
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One of the toughest things about writing a marriage/relationship column is that there isn’t a lot of articles out there to support the idea of a committed relationship. If you want to find articles on cheating or divorce, there is a large supply of material. Yes, the divorce rate my hover at 50% but where are the stories about the other 50%? It’s probably the usual story of “happy” not making good content. Everyone wants DRAMA.
Imagine my joy, then, when I saw an article on Yahoo! Shine titled, “Top 10 Reasons for Being — and Staying — Monogamous“. FINALLY.
A few points struck a chord:
Sex can improve with time.
Yes. YES.
Monogamy is meaningful.
Well, duh.
One that I took exception to was this one:
Freedom from relentless beauty rituals.
No. Just, NO. I get up every morning, shower, and pull myself together. I did it before I was married, I did it after I was married, I did it even when in the throes of newborn babies. I did not do it for others; I did it for ME. Taking a few moments to clean myself up and make myself pretty goes a long way towards helping me feel confident and secure and the opposite of schlumpy. It also make me feel sexy at times, which is always good for my “alone time” with my husband.
What about you lovelies? What are your reasons for being monogamous?
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I do it for the kids.
Kidding, kidding.
Although having the kids does sort of count. Where my husband and I were once ‘the family unit’ now there are four of us. Keeping the bonds strong between all the individuals - including my husband and I - is a big part of keeping the unit strong. I like having a strong unit, so I’m committed to the work it takes to keep us strong as a couple.
I really like your point about sex improving with time. So. True.
Danica Grunert | October 8th, 2010 at 10:22 am
Respect. Respect for Shawn, respect for our marriage, respect for my sense of self worth. Those things mean so much to me - to be unfaithful would be saying that I don’t care (totally not judging people who are not monogamous, just saying that for me and for us as a couple, monogamy is the only option.)
hillary | October 13th, 2010 at 4:30 pm
I completely agree about getting ready for ME. I HATE walking around in my pajamas all day and feeling frumpy.
Janssen | October 14th, 2010 at 1:47 pm