The snow has (FINALLY) melted and I don’t know about you, but it makes me want to get out of the house a lot more. It also makes me want to ramp up spending some time with my husband away from our kids. Cuddling under the blankets while watching a movie is great in the winter, but it’s time to soak up the sun. Here are a few ideas for a free way to spend time together.

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I’ve talked about love languages here a few times — and recently — because I believe that they are key thing to know about each other as you navigate married (or dating) life. If you know your spouse’s love language, you can know how to communicate with them on that level. And vice verse.

Lately, I’ve been fascinated about personality types and it’s given my husband and I even more insight into how we each work. He’s 95% introverted/5% extroverted and I’m 60% introverted/40% extroverted. Different, for sure, but if I were a 95% extrovert we’d probably have more conflict.

Do you and your spouse share similar or different personality types?

As we all know, February 14th is fast approaching. Valentine’s Day (or Love Day, as I refer to it)(Old school The Simpsons reference, there) means that we have to buy enough Valentine’s Day cards for three different kids’ classrooms. My kids are all talking about a Valentine’s Day dance at school (I DON’T KNOW EITHER) and each of their teachers are running with the them for the entire month of February.

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Yesterday morning my husband and I got our kids fed, dressed, and ready for school. They walked down to the road to catch the school bus and we loaded our ski gear into the truck and we headed to the local hill, just the two of us. We left the lake fog behind and spent the day under blue skies, basking in the sun. Getting our gear on was a breeze because we didn’t have to help three smaller people get their gear on (Or hear cries that ‘It doesn’t FEEL RIGHT) and getting our gear back off was just as easy.

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I don’t know about you guys, but my December went by in a bit of a blur. There was my kids’ school Christmas production, my husband’s work Christmas party, two different parties hosted by friends, and numerous other ‘extra’ activities connected to Christmas. Then there was Christmas Day, where we hosted a big feast. I love planning (and cooking) the big meal and I buzz around for days beforehand and the day of, and then when it’s over, I crash.

(Related: I spent the entire next day on the couch reading a book.)

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We live in an active community, and I know a number of couples who share both marital love and a love of the same physical activities. One couple runs together and they both race. Another couple like mountain biking on rugged trails and entering mountain biking events. Yet another couple enjoys hockey and play in the same league.

My husband and I … are nothing like them.

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The temperatures are cooling and the official first day of fall is just around the corner. Those long walks on the beach after a dinner out don’t have to end, you just have to trade out your breezy summer dress for jeans and a long-sleeved top. Here are a few other ideas:

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Weekends are when we recharge. Well, except for the three hours we spend at soccer EVERY SATURDAY MORNING. (This Saturday is the last day of soccer! Cue the fanfare!)

Aside from soccer, our weekends are pretty wide open. Friday nights are “pub night” (homemade pizza and appetizers) and Saturday nights alternate between family time and date night. Date nights are a necessity for us in order to keep us connected.

Sunday is church in the morning and we try to keep Sunday afternoons pretty low-key. We play outside, we go on hikes, we eat a steak dinner, we recharge before Monday rears its ugly head.

What do you do on the weekend?

I asked my three kids what they think marriage means.

My oldest:

You’re married to someone that you, um, love. And you really like them.

My middle:

It means that you find someone and, uh, that you really like? And you, um, like, to really know about about each other. And you go out for date nights and you get married.

My youngest:

It means that you love someone very much and you just want to marry them. Then they go out for date nights.

Well, I’m obviously not making stuff up when I write about date nights here. My kids know that we make them a priority and that they are important.

What does marriage mean to you and/or your kids?

This past Sunday I watched my husband, in character as a street cleaner in Jerusalem, talking about Passover in a monologue/skit that he dreamed up and performed. He gets up in front of over 400 people every Sunday to do an object lesson (Sometimes it’s Coca-Cola and Mentos, sometimes there’s fire involved, you get the idea)(He surprises everyone every week). I feel like he surprises me the most every week, because he never tells me what tricks he has up his sleeve ahead of me watching with everyone else. I’ve been married to him for almost twelve years and the young punk I married would not be standing up there, so comfortable in his skin and his role and doing the crazy things he does.

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