Viewing category ‘divorce’

Committed: The Ties that Bond

with Angella Dykstra

I'm a mom of three, a professional accountant, and an amateur photographer and writer. I am not a marriage expert. But my husband and I take "Til death do us part" seriously, and here I'll be sharing how we keep our marriage strong while we both do that insane work-life juggle.

Check out my Work It, Mom! profile and my blog, Dutch Blitz.

Do you have a pre-nuptial agreement?

Categories: commitment, divorce, marriage

2 Comments

I’ve read a number of posts about Jennifer Aniston’s (supposed) lack of a prenuptial agreement with her fiance Justin. The general consensus is that she would be a fool to not have a pre-nup. She is worth far more than he is, and he could gain far more in a divorce, etc.

For us mere mortals, is this even an issue? My husband and I got married twelve years ago, just as we were starting our careers. Sometimes I’m the primary breadwinner, sometimes he is. Our earnings all go into one pot, which pays for our house and all of our household costs. Should we ever divorce (not going to happen), everything would be split down the middle.

Do you have a prenuptial agreement? Why or why not?

Would your marriage survive an affair?

Categories: divorce, marriage

4 Comments

I’m sure that you’ve all heard about the Robert Pattinson/Kristen Stewart debacle, which is a hard one to miss because it is being dissected EVERYWHERE. It’s hard enough to find out that the one you love has cheated on you; I can’t imagine how horrible it must be for those two. I don’t know them at all (obviously), but for some reason I hope they can work it out.

I have never had my husband cheat on me, and neither of us plan on that happening, which is why we work hard at keeping our relationship fresh and alive. Date nights, sex more nights than not, time at the end of the day to connect, etc. We also don’t spend time alone with members of the opposite sex (i.e. coffee dates, movies, etc.) We do have friends of the opposite sex, but we hang out in groups.


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Is marriage harder for celebrities?

Categories: commitment, divorce, marriage

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I’m sure that you’ve read a hundred posts by now about the fact that Katie Holmes filed for divorce from Tom Cruise. There is much speculation about the why (Scientology weirdness being the main reason), but who really knows? Maybe he’s not the same smiling/happy guy he is for the public, or one hundred other possible reasons. Their impending divorce got me thinking about celebrity divorces in general.


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Did you have a ‘friendly’ divorce?

Categories: Uncategorized, divorce, family, marriage

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While I have never been divorced, I am a child with divorced parents. They have each been divorced a couple of times over, and I wouldn’t call their splits ‘friendly’. Well, except for my Dad’s divorce from his third wife, who I call Mom (It’s complicated). It was a rocky split at the beginning, but they have worked out a pretty good system for parenting their four kids. They are in no way BFF’s, nor do they hang out, but they don’t harbor anger and vent it in front of the kids.


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Dealing with “parent issues”

Categories: divorce, family

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I come from a broken family, and by “broken”, I mean that my Mom has been married three times. My Dad, five times. We’ve weathered all of that, the best that we can. I am in close contact with my Dad and his current wife, and also his third wife, because she was my Mom throughout my teenage years and ever since then. She is the best Grandma that my kids have, and she counsels me when I ask for it.


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Thoughts On Divorce

Categories: divorce, marriage

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My Twitter feed lit up the other day with people referring to a post written by a woman, with the title “Divorce is immature and selfish. Don’t do it.”) (No, I’m not linking to it, because it was an obvious traffic link-baiting post. Feel free to Google if you must, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.)

The title alone is such a blanket statement and some of her points are more ridiculous than others. “Divorce reflects mental illness” is one such example.


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Would you change your name if you got divorced?

Categories: divorce

5 Comments

Yes, I talk about how my husband and I plan to stay married “’til death do us part”, and no, we are not having any problems (in fact, this year has been our best yet). I just read this article at The Stir about Camille Grammer considering changing back to her maiden name after her sixteen-year marriage to Kelsey ended bad way (he cheated, is dragging her through the courts for sole custody of their kids, he’s seems to be an expert in douchebaggery, etc.)


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Is your marriage ‘Good Enough’?

Categories: commitment, divorce, marriage

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A post I read yesterday at The Motherlode — ‘Is the ‘Good Enough’ Marriage Good For The Children‘ — grabbed my interest and also made me shake my head a little bit. The author refers to an article in The Atlantic where the author talks about how she may never find a husband.

She broke up with an “exceptional person, intelligent, good-looking, loyal, kind. My friends, many of whom were married or in marriage-track relationships, were bewildered. I was bewildered. To account for my behavior, all I had were two intangible yet undeniable convictions: something was missing; I wasn’t ready to settle down.”


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Date nights increase your chances of staying married

Categories: divorce, marriage

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UsWell, at least I think so. I may not be an expert, at all, but this study makes me think there may be some truth to my belief.

“An extra-marital affair is no longer the most common reason for married couples to divorce, family lawyers have revealed.”

(Yay!)

“In a survey of the country’s leading family law firms, the main reason for divorce proceedings was given as couples falling out of love.”

(BOO.)


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Are there different “levels” of affairs?

Categories: Uncategorized, divorce, marriage

4 Comments

Emma Waverman wrote a post asking, “Would you stick around after an affair?” I’ve asked the question here before, and I think it’s a good one to think about. I know some people who have stuck together after an affair and worked through it, and I know yet others who have walked away and I can’t say that I blame them. Having kids makes it a little more complicated, at least for me, but I’m hoping I never have to make that decision.


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