This past Sunday I watched my husband, in character as a street cleaner in Jerusalem, talking about Passover in a monologue/skit that he dreamed up and performed. He gets up in front of over 400 people every Sunday to do an object lesson (Sometimes it’s Coca-Cola and Mentos, sometimes there’s fire involved, you get the idea)(He surprises everyone every week). I feel like he surprises me the most every week, because he never tells me what tricks he has up his sleeve ahead of me watching with everyone else. I’ve been married to him for almost twelve years and the young punk I married would not be standing up there, so comfortable in his skin and his role and doing the crazy things he does.

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My husband and I kiss (peck) goodbye in the morning and we kiss (peck) hello when we get home from work. We will sometimes get schmoopy in front of the kids and have a (long, drawn out) kiss (because we want to mortify them). We generally keep our passionate (BARF) kisses for the bedroom.

This Stir article, “10 Things You Didn’t Know About Kissing” is a good read. One of the interesting facts:

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As we all know, Valentine’s Day (or Love Day, for the old school Simpsons fans) is next week. The merchandise has been out since the day after Christmas and it’s all you hear about on t.v. or online. Gift guides and date ideas and giveaways, oh my!

I’ve mentioned before that my husband and I don’t really celebrate Valentine’s Day. It started out because we didn’t want to buy into the commercialism, and we went on regular date nights as it was. There has been the occasional Valentine’s Day where we’ve surprised the other with something, but we usually have the “We’re not buying presents, RIGHT?” conversation and we both stick to it. Usually.

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My husband and I always knew that we wanted to have kids, even before we were married. We were married on May 20, 2000, and spent the next year working and saving so that we could move away from the Big City and buy a house in a small community in farm country.

I started pestering him about trying for our first baby about six months after we moved and after giving me reasons why we should wait, about six months later he agreed that we should start trying. A miscarriage happened, first, but we gave birth to our first boy at the end of December, 2002.

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You have probably seen that “first kiss” video online but if you haven’t, here you go.

While my husband and I didn’t have “special time” until we were married, kissing happened long before that date. I have no idea how you could not kiss, but that video reminded me of a couple who had made the same “no kissing” vow, but would nuzzle and kiss cheeks and make me wonder WHAT THE DIFFERENCE WAS. I’d prefer if they’d just given a quick kiss rather than subjecting me to all of their pent-up frustrations.

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Thanksgiving has come and gone, as has Black Friday and Cyber Monday. Everywhere I look (and read), people have been snapping up presents for their significant other. Me too!

Um, no, not really. Though I do have a few ideas (he needs a new wallet and a watch and…maybe some underwear? DEFINITELY some underwear).

He keeps asking me what I want and my list is pretty small. An external keyboard for my (new) iPad 2, some new workout DVD’s and workout clothes, and…maybe some peripheral camera gear.

Back before we had kids we’d set a pretty decent budget for each other but we were DINKS (Heh) and now we’ve been trying to be smarter with our money. We also have a lot of “stuff” and would rather spend money on good experiences and memories.

(Sorry to get all deep there. We still like presents! Who DOESN’T?)

What are you getting each other for Christmas/Hannukah/The Holidays?

It is Thanksgiving this weekend (DUH) and this is as good of a time as any to list the reasons that I am thankful for my husband.

1. He chose me to be the one he spends his life with. He takes the love, honor, and cherish vows seriously. I am blessed by this every day.

2. He is the best Dad EVER. He would take a bottle feeding in the night when we had newborns so I could have a little extra sleep. He is one of the most ‘hands-on’ Dads I have ever even heard of (jazz class and bath time and wiping bums, oh my!). He is involved.

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We’ve all watched The Notebook, I’m sure, and cried at the ending, I’m sure. If you didn’t cry during The Notebook, then I suggest that you go see your Doctor to check if you still have a heart.

I know that I hope to grow old with my husband and we joke about what we’re going to be like when we’re old and grey. Riding scooters, going on cruises, playing with grandbabies. He’ll be wearing socks and sandals and I’ll be sporting short curly hair.

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Last week, I received an email from a long-time reader — both of my personal site and this here column — and she was looking for some advice.

Remember when I commented “What’s so hard about marriage”?  Ha!  Ha ha ha ha!  I was so naïve.  And it hasn’t even been 2 months!

Month 1 - awesome.  Honeymoon.

Month 2 - ouch.

I was totally unprepared.  We had lived together for a year so I really didn’t know what would change.  That was not so bright on my part - we had discussed what would change!

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We often hear stories of brides and/or grooms getting “cold feet” right before their wedding. It is understandable, for sure. You are making a commitment to bind yourself to another person not just emotionally, but legally, ’til death do you part. Standing on that precipice, waiting to take the leap, could easily strike fear in one’s heart.

In the middle of the spectrum is the bride/groom who isn’t scared to get married, but is wound up tightly will all of the details that go into the wedding day. There is so much to do in such a short time and they stress about everything being “perfect.” Nerves are frazzled and they tend to vibrate from the anxiety.

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