My least favorite part of freelancing is that it feels—more than any office job I ever had—like a moving target. I’m not even referring to the goals of the job; there’s always new gigs to pursue, changes in existing work, progress of the field as a whole, etc. I’m referring to the balance between work and home, the school year and the summer, and my family’s changing needs.
Nearly a decade into this, I’m still dealing with the jarring shift in my days every single summer when the school year ends. I feel ridiculous, saying that. It’s not as though I’m unaware that school will let out and my kids will be around. It’s not as though it’s different every year. It’s just that, somehow, it is different every year, as the kids grow and their needs change. What worked the year before is never quite right for the current year, and so every year we have to rethink, readjust, find what works all over again.
When I started homeschooling my youngest, that was a huge shift (and our most difficult one yet). I was sure I couldn’t do it. Surely I would end up short-changing both him and my career. And yet… somehow, we’re making it work. We made changes after the first year. Now we’re making more changes, after the second year. But I feel/felt good about our progress.
I was unprepared for this year’s wrench in the works.
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