Recently Nataly asked the 64-thousand-dollar question: How do you leave work at work when you work from home?

Part of the reason I named this blog “Cornered Office” was because I like how the play on words highlights the conundrum of trying to separate work from home when work is home. Part of my justification for starting freelancing was that I could work while the kids are at school and stop working when they get home.

Hahahahaha! I’m funny! Sure, I’ll just stop working when the bus pulls up, because I am never right in the middle of something or calling out “Hey guys! Grab a snack! I’ll be right with you, I’m almost done with this!” as they walk in. And of course the children are never home sick, languishing on the couch while I type away and promise to get them some more ginger ale in just one second.

All of this is to say, I’ve by no means mastered this. Being a working mother is, by its very definition, a juggling act. I think it’s slightly more complex when you do that work from home, but really, who am I to say that that’s any worse/harder than the mom stuck at the office or checking her email via Crackberry while playing Monopoly?

Here are my tips, for what they’re worth. (In case you’re wondering what they’re worth, I can tell you that one of these and a couple of bucks will get you a cup of coffee. No need to thank me.)

Love thy routine, and keep it holy. Certainly start with the ideal. I allow myself 10 minutes in the morning to check my email while the kids get ready. Once they’re down in the kitchen, I’m focused on them until they get on the bus. I don’t schedule meetings during after-school hours, and my daily goal is to be able to push back from the computer when the kids get home. It is very rare that we don’t eat dinner together; that, for me, is an important family ritual. It doesn’t need to be yours, but you do need to have something that is your sacred time that only the biggest of fires is allowed to interrupt.

Don’t be afraid to say no. You know how in parenting they say to choose your battles? You’re allowed to do that in work, too. Sometimes you have to tell a client you won’t be available. (And maybe you’ll fib a little or maybe you’ll just be firm and not offer a reason; either way, you’re allowed.) Sometimes you need to stop and breathe and remind yourself that putting off [insert crucial work-related activity here] for three hours until the kiddo is in bed won’t make the earth stop turning. And you know what? Sometimes telling the kids that they need to start their homework or read or a book or simply find a way to amuse themselves for half an hour while you finish up is perfectly okay, too.

Time it! If you—like me—are prone to losing track of time when you’re engrossed in something, make friends with the clock (this works especially well if your kids can tell time). My kids keep me honest. If I say “give me some time to finish this” they say “tell me what time.” I tell them what time I will push back from the computer and they hold me to it. (Kids too young to tell time? Let them carry around a kitchen timer.) It’s okay to do this the other way ’round, too: When you need to, tell them you’ll play for an hour (or whatever) and then you need to work a bit more.

Maximize the mommy moments. One thing I’ve noticed since returning to work is that I’m much more mindful of the time I do spend focused on my kids. When I was a stay-at-home mom it was very tempting to try to discourage the kids from “helping” me cook, for example, because it takes longer and makes a mess. But now those sorts of things are some of my favorite times with my kids. Or I’ll say, “Hey, I have to get the laundry going, but if you don’t mind coming in here with me while I do it, I’d love to to hear the rest of that story.”

Life isn’t perfect, and neither are you. You know what I said up there about routine? Forget about it. Well, no, don’t; but do realize that sometimes it doesn’t work that way. Sometimes you have to take a call when the kids are home. Sometimes you have to keep working when the kids want you. I’m giving you permission to be imperfect, and reminding you not to waste energy on feeling guilty about it. If you feel guilty, tell yourself you could be using that energy to finish up what you’re doing and go hang out with your kids.

Failing all of the preceding suggestions, I hear having a magic wand works pretty well, too. I’ve been way too busy working to track one of those down, though.