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Cornered Office

with Mir Kamin

I'm a freelance writer and mother of two working from home, which theoretically means I can set my own schedule so as to best accommodate my family. In reality, "flexible hours" often equals "working too much." Yes, I'm my own boss; no, that doesn't mean life is easy. It's hard to leave the office when you live there. But I love what I do and feel very lucky. And not just because I get paid to work in my pajamas.

To learn more about Mir, check out her profile on Work It, Mom! or visit her blog at

Going to Mom 2.0? Another quick conference primer!

Categories: Maybe I can pencil in a nap, Now I'm free(lancing)


In a couple of days I’ll be traveling to New Orleans for this year’s Mom 2.0 Summit, and although I’ve covered various aspects of choosing a conference, preparing for a conference, and what the heck to do at a conference, before, I’m going to do it again.

Because a refresher is always good, even for me. Also because we’ve all mostly forgotten those other posts. Right? Right!

It’s been a while since I did a sizable conference, so either I’ve forgotten what they’re like or this one is particularly packed (maybe a little bit of both?), but I am finding the various announcements of parties and gatherings and suites and things to do kind of overwhelming, to say the least. So maybe you don’t need a refresher, but I think I actually do. I kind of had to have a little talk with myself this morning about how to handle all of this. And now I’m going to share it with you.

It’s very easy to get swept up in the mindset of “Well I’m here, I should do everything.” For some people, that totally works. For those of us for whom it doesn’t, here’s what to remember.

1) Remember why you’re attending the conference. I am attending Mom 2.0 to a) speak and b) network. There will likely be some people there I’ll be delighted to see, but for me this is not a social trip or mini vacation. I have specific goals to bear in mind. Some of the ramifications therein are obvious; say, I’m never going to go on a trip like this and choose to stay up all night partying. But other conclusions may be harder to reach; as an introvert, I’m inclined to skip some social events that may offer networking opportunities, and then I have to figure out what the odds are of such an event being worth my time. (Now—bear in mind—I’m coming at this from my perspective of this being a business opportunity. I know some people go to conferences to socialize and I’m not knocking that, just saying that’s not how I, personally, approach it.)

2) Know your limits, but leave your options open. Um, apparently one of the sponsored events at Mom 2.0 this year is a “pajama party” on Friday night. I know myself well enough to know that my desire to participate in this event falls somewhere between “please just kill me now” and “I will be tired and cranky and need my sleep.” Chances are excellent that I will honor my personal limitations and not go. But you know what? I’ll bring a pair of pajamas I’m willing to wear to it, just in case. Maybe I’ll be feeling all energized and willing to step out of my comfort zone, and then wouldn’t I feel silly if I didn’t have the option?

3) The conference is the thing, but so is all of the other stuff. I’ll tell you right now that I really do not understand people who go to conferences and attend none of the sessions. It doesn’t make sense to me. But on the other hand, I used to fall prey to the “I’m here and there are great sessions and I have to go to all of them!” mindset, which is really no better. Networking happens between sessions, during sessions (in other locations), and, yes, at parties. I handle this as best I can by sitting down with a schedule and figuring out the things I really want to attend, and then trying to guesstimate how I’m likely to want to spend my time otherwise, and plan accordingly. (For example: Should I decide that for some reason I really want to attend the pajama party, I will make sure I build at least an hour of quiet-alone-time into my evening before I have to go do that. It’s just something I’ll need.)

4) Dress for success, but mostly dress to feel fabulous. I’m a big believer in dressing for the job you want to have, rather than the job you do have. I also like to dress up and I like how I feel when I’m wearing something pretty. That said, there is absolutely a sweet spot between “looking like you just rolled out of bed” (which, again, if you’re not there to do business, carry on, I suppose) and “did you kill a high-end hooker for those shoes.” What should you wear? You should wear what makes you feel confident and is comfortable enough to get you through a few long days. While I don’t think it’s necessary to have multiple outfits for every day, be honest with yourself about what will make you feel best. Does changing into something clean before the evening’s festivities make you feel better? Then absolutely do it. Comfy in that dress all day and evening? Great, rock on.

5) Embrace an opportunity you normally might not. One of the things the Mom 2.0 organizers did this year that I think is fabulous is that they’ve built “experience New Orleans” right into the schedule. How many times have you gone to a conference and barely left the hotel? And then someone says “How was [cityname]?” and your response is “It looked exactly like a hotel lobby.” Now; strictly speaking, in the business sense, will going on a tour of the French Quarter build my business? Not directly. But I’ll enjoy the tour and chat with other folks and who knows. It’s still networking, and I’ve got the opportunity to do it while having a really unique experience. (For the record, Mom 2.0 is also offering a “High Tea and High Strategy” session at the hotel in that time slot, and I’m not going to lie, my inclination was definitely to stay and do that. More “businessy” and all. But you know what? I’m going to go see New Orleans.)

I know some regular readers will be there, too, and I hope you’ll come say hi! I always love putting faces with names (or real people with screen shots). Anything to add on preparation?

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6 comments so far...

  • Such smart tips Mir. I love the line about dressing for the job you want to have. (Although that might require me actually wearing those pajamas to the sessions.)

    Can’t wait to see you. And uh…network.

    Mom101  |  April 12th, 2011 at 12:53 pm

  • Good synopsis and good advice. Blogging conferences for me are an interesting deal. Blogging is my hobby. It will never be my full-time job. So, I go primarily for the content and the experience (meeting people, networking). I want to learn tips and tools first, but I likely won’t attend the “learn to pitch” sessions. That’s just not my bag, nor is it what I want my bag to be. But, pajama parties? Yes. I WAS in a sorority after all!

    elz  |  April 12th, 2011 at 6:49 pm

  • What kids of things are at a “mom” conference? Is this just for vendors (how to market to moms) or would a “mom” get something out of it?

    Marcia  |  April 13th, 2011 at 2:39 pm

  • Marcia, generally these conferences focus dually on the experience of moms who blog (though that expands outward to encompass women who are not mothers, and even men, who tend to find themselves in a similar online space) as well as creating a space where companies who are interested in connecting with those writers have the opportunity to do so.

    I write professionally, but I have found that the split between “pro” and “hobby” writers at these conferences is often about even. And there are companies looking to generate interest in their products as well as companies who are just interested in building general goodwill.

    Does that help?

    Mir  |  April 13th, 2011 at 3:17 pm

  • Thank you for the explanation!

    Marcia  |  April 13th, 2011 at 3:20 pm

  • Number one is SO important, I think, for every conference - especially HUGE conferences where it’s easy to get lost in the great spiraling mass of THINGS TO DO.

    It was so great to finally meet you. :-)

    Miss Britt  |  April 18th, 2011 at 4:00 pm