In The Connected and Committed Leader, author Laura Lopez, a former vice-president at the Coca-Cola Company, encourages professionals to adopt a more personal approach to leadership. We asked Lopez to share some of her insight about how becoming a mom to her adopted daughter helped her become a better manager.

What prompted you to write The Connected and Committed Leader?

When we left for Russia to pick up our daughter, a colleague of mine congratulated me and also told me that everything that I learned and that had made me successful in business… well, it didn’t work at home with children. I was taken aback and really thought that I was going to be a terrible mom.

That comment stuck with me for the two months that I stayed home with my daughter. One day, while spending time with my daughter, I got it. What my colleague meant by that comment was that management skills don’t easily transfer from work to home, but I suddenly realized that leadership skills do in fact work as effectively at home as they do in business. Parenting epitomizes the line that we all tow as leaders: how to guide, influence and inspire without resorting to command and control.

You encourage readers to “bring your heart to work.”  That’s not necessarily what you might expect to read in a book about business leadership.  How does your idea of leadership differ from more traditional business leadership models?

My leadership model is based on the fact that we all need to redefine leadership. We have an old definition attempting to fit an entirely new marketplace today. There was a time and place where command and control was effective. Now, it no longer works. Whether you are a parent or a business manager, you want to draw best out of each person. You want to guide them towards unleashing their potential. The common ingredient to all of these insights is that people are inspired by others because of human connection. Connection requires heart.

How did becoming a mother impact your idea of good leadership?  In what ways did parenthood impact your professional development?

My daughter stripped all of my corporate armor away. She exposed me to my very core and for the first time, I understood vulnerability. I saw how being vulnerable and “giving in” gave her power and when she gained power, she was happy and productive. Too many managers and parents “fight for authority” when the real power is in “letting go.” When I finally understood this, I was more effective in leading and influencing others.

What are some of the unique challenges and rewards you’ve experienced as a working mother?

Prioritize constantly. Re-prioritize on a daily basis. Follow through on those priorities with no remorse. So for example, when I prioritize walking my daughter to school and accompanying her to some key activities, I am present with this choice. I am not occupying my mind with the calls I need to make or multi-tasking with my BlackBerry. Book it and keep to your schedule. If something comes up for business, I don’t bump my daughter. I respect the commitment and the priority I have set. Likewise, I set my priorities with my work and if something comes up, I let her know that I have set another commitment and I honor that commitment. It teaches her boundaries and respect for commitments which are important lessons to model.

What’s the best advice you have for women trying to balance motherhood and career?

Don’t try to balance. Blend. Our worlds are converging. We can no longer afford to segment and categorize ourselves any longer. This takes needless energy. When people say, “I am this way at home and this way at work,” I say “stop.” Be YOU in both places. Don’t reinforce this idea that our hearts don’t belong in work. They do. If we don’t bring our hearts to work, then it is just work.

The Connected and Committed Leader: Lessons from Home, Results at Work, by Laura Lopez (Living Leadership Press, 2008)