Entrepreneur Mom
with Aliza Sherman
If you own a business - home-based or otherwise - this is the blog where you'll find practical tips and smart ideas about entrepreneurship. I've started and run 4 different businesses so "been there, done that." I'll also invite successful entrepreneurs to share their best advice with you.
To learn more about Aliza, check out her profile on Work It, Mom! and her website, www.mediaegg.com.
In the constant quest for work/life balance tips, problogger Gina Blitstein spoke with Michelle Riggen-Ransom and Pamela O’Hara of BatchBlue Software for their take on priorities and running a business AND family.
It’s no revelation to say that having a business requires a complete commitment. The same can be said of motherhood. When you wear both of these hats, the demands can seem overwhelming! How do you reconcile the amount you give of yourself to your business with the amount of yourself that you devote to your personal and family life? How do you make sure there’s enough of you to go around to remain happy and effective in both arenas?
The answer depends on your priorities.
I recently interviewed two accomplished mothers (who just happen to run the same company) about how they manage their roles as businesswomen and moms. Both women are emotionally invested in their business and fiercely dedicated to its success. They are equally passionate as mothers, committed to spending quality time with their families, despite their busy work life. Their answers, however, were surprisingly different.
Pamela O’Hara, President of BatchBlue Software, routinely works a 60-hour week. A
s a mother of 3 children aged 2, 5 and 7, Pamela appreciates the flexibility her schedule allows. While sometimes business is the focus, at other times the needs of her family come first.
Pamela explains, “The challenge with work/life balance is in all the grey areas.” As far as maintaining a clear delineation between what is ‘work’ time and what is ‘personal/family’ time, she admits that it’s a daily challenge. As for designating certain hours ‘for work’ or ‘for family,’ Pamela says any schedule is, “more of a guideline than a rule.”
According to Pamela, communication between work and family is key. “I try to communicate each to the other. I talk to my kids and husband about my work. So when I do have to take an afternoon to work they understand better why I have to do it. And same with the work environment. At BatchBlue we very much respect each other’s personal lives. We share what is happening professionally and personally in staff meetings and in the daily “status” e-mails we send to each other. We maintain flexible schedules so that everyone does have the ability to work family obligations into their workday as needed. In the end we all want the same thing - a healthy family and a successful business so as long as all is being communicated (which is not always easy, but something to keep working towards) they should be able to live together harmoniously.”
Pamela reassures women trying to balance the demands of a professional life with their personal life by revealing, “It doesn’t ever balance. Sometimes it swings one way, sometimes the other. Take it one day at a time and enjoy both. If you do you will be a better worker and family member.”
Michelle Riggen-Ransom is Director of Communications at BatchBlue Software where she averages 50 hours weekly. In contrast to her business partner, this mother of a 6 and a 2 year old says that she and her family are best served by a more structured approach. “I have to have a pretty strict schedule to make it all work for me,” Michelle says. She finds that compartmentalizing work and personal/family life is the best approach for her. She believes that, ideally, “when you are at work you think about work, when you are with the kids, you should fully be with them.” As far as maintaining the delineation between work and family time, Michelle says, “I’m pretty good at it, actually.”
While Michelle says that her personal and professional life are pretty integrated, she admits, “Family trumps work.” Ultimately what helps Michelle maintain separation of work and family is, “having a schedule that works, which I try very hard to stick to. That said, the slightest thing can throw it off (sick sitter or kid, unexpected travel etc.) so the line does invariably get blurred. You need to have a contingency plan in place for those times.”
Michelle advises women to cut themselves some slack when attempting to balance their work and life. “There is no perfect solution, no “having it all,” she says, “so don’t put pressure on yourself to try to create it.”
What, ultimately, is the payoff for making the balance work for you? Pamela says, “I think it is important to feel a sense of accomplishment outside of my family responsibilities. For me, that gives me the confidence and challenge I need to appreciate my own self worth. I think I make a much better parent understanding that I am an accomplished adult.” As for the flipside of the coin, regarding her family, she says, “They remind me daily why I want to be accomplished.” Michelle adds that while her house could use some straightening, “Hopefully my children will remember that they were loved and listened to and adored by parents who worked hard at their interesting jobs.”
Every woman will confront the challenges of divvying herself up among her various roles. Take into consideration your own priorities, whether you strive for a great amount of freedom or a high degree of structure - or somewhere in between. You can find an individual, workable balance between your work and personal life that will satisfy each and most importantly - you.
Where do your priorities lie when balancing your work and family?
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My kids’ “needs” come first. Because my kids don’t have a dad, there is no question that I have to be there when they are sick or scared, and to make sure they are well-fed, rested, clothed, groomed, stimulated, and protected 24/7. I can outsource some of the details, but I’m pretty hands-on in many respects.
That said, I work more than full-time, and my kids’ lives are impacted by my work. I actually want them to be involved to the extent it helps them learn without preventing me from getting the job done. But most days, I carve out a good 3-4 hours to focus just on them. I will occasionally have work-oriented adult discussions or take a phone call during those times, which I think exposes them in a positive way to the grown-up world, but it’s “our” time unless a work emergency comes up. There are few things in white-collar business that can’t wait from 5:30pm until 8:30pm.
SKL | October 23rd, 2009 at 1:29 am
Found your article really interesting and really commend Pam and Michelle for their passionate commitment to having both business success and being great mothers.
Pam and Michelle’s views are similar to those of successful Australian women entrepreneurs. As a pay it forward project, my colleague and I conducted a survey of the life work balance of women entreprepeneurs (in Australia, USA, Canada, UK). While the idea of ‘balance’ is something most women were seeking, there were a number of successful women who didn’t agree with the notion of ‘balance’ - instead followed the idea of a flow between work and life. Some spoke about structured flexibility which really appeals to me and is pretty much how I manage my days- you have the flexibility of working out your hours, but you structure those hours around your priorities each day. Some days that may mean more work than family and other days vice versa.
As they both point out - there is no right way - depends on the individual woman -her priorities and the way she works best.
Thank you for the opportunity to comment
Jayne Jennings | October 25th, 2009 at 10:25 am
I think of it as a somewhat permeable solid line. I’m technically available to work early AM & late PM hours, but I leave it on ring only to phone calls and my workplace is pretty respectful of calling people’s cells only for emergencies.
Mich | October 26th, 2009 at 9:22 pm