with Britt Reints
Forget the 9 to 5; Full Time, All the Time is a blog about the mobile working life - when you have the freedom to work from anywhere and the responsibility of always having your smartphone turned on. Britt Reints works as a freelance writer while traveling fulltime in an RV with her husband and two kids. She explores balancing real-life bills with an unconventional work life, and finding time to maintain relationships with family and friends.
You can also find Britt at InPursuitOfHappiness.net.
Categories: balance, flextime, office life, working mom
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This evening, I came across the latest issue of BusinessWeek, a issue being touted as special because it’s the first issue “created in collaboration with readers.” With the help of surveys, blogs and polls, the magazine identified the problems its readers were facing at work, and attempted to find the answers.
Interesting.
I quickly flipped to the article entitled “How to Get a Life and Do Your Job,” and tucked in. I mean, if there was ever a person who was having a hard time achieving work-life balance these days, I am that person. I’ve been working almost twelve-hour days lately, and feel like I’m neglecting my husband and daughter. Something has to give, and I couldn’t wait to read the article to learn what quick tips I could do to manage my life a little better.
Now before I go any further, let me just say that some of the tips submitted by readers are reasonable and logical. “Switch off the e-mail and the Blackberry,” says one wise employee. “My wife and I have achieved a great work-life balance through strategic planning,” explained another. The ideas presenting by both are worth reading. That said, do you know what almost half of the contributing readers said that they did to achieve their work-life balance? Do you?
They quit.
A couple of people quit their jobs for different, more worker-friendly companies. One person quit his job “in a prestigious institution to work fewer hours in a less glamorous environment,” and has “no regrets.” In still another case, both husband and wife quit, explaining, “we needed to hit Control + Alt+ Delete on our lives and start over.”
Huh.
I have to tell you, I find this most depressing. Has working life in the twenty-first century become so insane, living a stressful life become so socially acceptable, that the only way that you can possibly ever feel both satisfied at work, and sufficiently attentive to your own life and family is to quit? Have we gotten to the point where the only way to survive the pressures of life is to simply go and go and go, and then just give up and start all over? Is there no way to work in the corporate world and be energized by both the time spent at the office, as well as the time spent with family? Seriously?
What do you think? More importantly, how do you do it?
Karen,
Very interesting post. As an employee of Corporate America and a PT home business owner, I can relate. Most people here know that I’m working towards firing Corporate America. Why? Because I want freedom - time, financial and most of all, I was ready to put my brain and efforts to work for me instead of someone else. :0)
I believe the employee work force is changing. Flex time, more time off, and the ability to work from home is becoming more of the trend. And some companies realize that and some do not.
Different generations expect different things and companies need to realize that.
And be willing to change with the needs of their employee base.
A happy employee is a more productive employee.
It is a shame that many people feel the need to start completely over. I always thought Corporate America was my only option, but once I saw other opportunities, it has given me the drive to explore my options and to really go for those dreams.
BELIEVE Success!
Lisa
Lisa Willard | August 27th, 2008 at 10:25 am
I don’t find that odd at all. Our needs and priorities change throughout our lives; why wouldn’t the same be true of what we look for in a workplace? Outside of a very small company where I have a fair amount of pull, the workplace isn’t going to change for my life changes. Yeah, it can give a little - let me take my laptop home, let me answer my emails from 11-5 and 9-12 instead of being at my desk at 8:30am, let me take odd-hour conference calls with faint toddler chatter in the background. But a big company isn’t going to overhaul every job description to accommodate each employee’s life changes. If there’s a client meeting in Boonestown KY, I need to get my booty on a plane the evening before and miss tucking my kids in for at least 2 nights. Or, I need to quit my job. Sure, they will offer me the option of going on part time. But my clients are still in Boonestown, KY. And there are still only a couple available flights. And if I give up my remote clients, that’s the same as quitting my job.
I really don’t see a problem here. It is a very hard decision to make, I’ll grant you that. There are things I really liked about my job that I don’t get with my present job. The transition to a whole new career is almost as stressful as the transition from childlessness to parenthood. But that’s life. Clinging to remnants of our past, that don’t fit with who we now are, will only make the our life transitions that much harder.
For those who already have a job that fits you both before and after becoming a parent, I am truly happy for you. It just isn’t reality for many of us. And I’m OK with that.
SKL | August 27th, 2008 at 11:04 am
very interesting article! I think there is a huge difference between changing jobs, changing careers, and quitting all together. Changing jobs is just how you progress in a particular career. Changing Careers - now that’s a tough one! as we change a lot of times we realize ‘hey this isn’t what i want to do, i want to do that shiny thing over there’ and now we have the luxury of doing that. Previous generations didn’t always have that. As for quitting all together, i think unless you made a lovely nest egg or won the lottery or something along those lines - that’s a pretty difficult one to pull off…
In each case it’s different because everyone’s priorities and situations are different. I think what is most difficult is when you are trying to make everything a number 1 priority and that is just unrealistic. The hardest thing for me to do is to prioritize – right now I have about 10 things in spots 1, 2, and 3 and the battles are getting ugly! Where there any tips on setting priorities?!! Ha!
Kate | August 27th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
I did just that - quit. It was gradual at first, until it was time to move on. The eye opener for me was when I was talking to a new acquaintance and explained my flexible work schedule. Her response was, “I was never really a clock puncher myself.” Of course, I was angry. I put in insane hours and traveled regardless of flexibility. Only, when I really looked at it, I realized I was using it as a way to avoid my job - guarding my flexibility like it was sacred ground.
There are two reasons for work life imbalance - self-inflicted and corporate culture. If you have handled the self-inflicted kind with throwing the *rack-berry in the Charles River (or your nearest geological sink hole) and things are better, good for you! However, you can’t battle corporate culture, and then it is time to go.
We are all going to work a very long time. For many of us on Work-it Mom, I’d guess it is part of our DNA. But there is no rule that says you have to do what you are doing or even stay in the same career or position when it makes you unhappy.
Quitting does not equal failure. It is almost amazing how liberating and right it can be.
Michele | August 27th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
RE: Kate’s comment: “Quitting does not equal failure. It is almost amazing how liberating and right it can be.”
I love that. Thank you for saying that so succinctly.
Karen from Full Time, All the Time and Chookooloonks | August 27th, 2008 at 4:23 pm
I’m unfortunately beginning to believe that’s the case. As a new mom working fulltime, I’m struggling to figure out this whole work-life balance and really starting to think the only way to have a semblance of the flexibility I crave is to work for myself.
I had high hopes my employer would be flexible about my schedule (my predecessor had two work-at-home days, etc.), but my request was denied. Apparently, her arrangement was never much liked around our office… and I don’t even work for “corporate America.” I work at a university as a writer/editor and if ever there was a position that lent itself to flexibility, this would be it. But alas, there’s still the mindset that unless you’re in your seat at work, you’re not working.
I don’t see that changing, so I know that what will eventually change is my job and that I’ll be working for myself in the next couple of years. I’m excited about that prospect, but I also find it depressing to know that I will be one more woman who felt her only chance for work-life balance was to quit. I truly believe it shouldn’t have to be that way.
Dawn | August 27th, 2008 at 4:47 pm
I knew what the big “solution” was going to be even before I read it. I made the same decision a few years back. Except for the income, I haven’t really regretted quitting the full time lifestyle. I’ll echo the thought about life priorities changing. I think that’s a valid point. But I think there’s more to it. It feels as though the frenetic pace that we might have become accustomed to as a society has lost its appeal. More value is being placed on time and enjoying each moment. Dare I say it might have something to do with the shock we all felt when 9/11 happened? I think we were beginning to simplify, but once that happened, life everywhere became precarious. I know that was the moment I shifted my thinking. One day, I may have the desire to have a full work life, but working part time is the only thing that makes sense for me right now while the kids are little. And surprisingly, I don’t miss the buzz that I used to get in my “high power” job. I never thought that would ever happen…
Sugar | August 27th, 2008 at 8:20 pm
I too am a new mom that works full time. Though I was elated to find that my “corporate america” employer accepted my proposition to work from home twice a week, I still feel like I am trapped by work.
I strive to work my normal work schedule while at home and at the same time have my son with me. The result? I end up working 12 hour days on the days I am home. I usually only break to glance at my son in his play gym watching tv every couple of minutes.
Luckily, at this point he is still immobile and sleeps alot. My fear is once he starts moving and waking longer, I don’t see how it can work. I would love to have a job that would allow me to be flexible in what hours I work each day, rather than where I work each day but I am afraid of asking. I would hate for them to think I am not grateful for what I have now.
I go back and forth with what I want, but when I really think about it, I just want the best of both worlds. Maybe one day, my employer would allow flex time and truly offer employees the balance we all deserve.
Lisa | August 28th, 2008 at 7:15 am
In some sectors of the corporate world, yes. Absolutely. There is no “balance” when an employee is expected to work 60+ hours per week. There is no balance when taking your vacation time is discouraged. There is no balance when managers and companies cannot recognize that their employees are HUMAN BEINGS with lives. Men and women, parents and non-parents, black and white, whatever. That is ridiculous.
So, for some, the answer absolutely is to quit.
Robyn | August 28th, 2008 at 11:09 am
Dawn, you captured my life at this moment EXACTLY. My last day at the university is next Thursday. I wanted some telecommute days, but they wouldn’t go for it (even though I have previously telecommuted while I was in school - now that I’m a mom it’s not acceptable for some reason). And it’s frustrating. I tried to find something - anything - part time, but no luck. So I’ll be freelancing from home in order to spend more time with my 9 month old. I felt forced to quit. I believe it shouldn’t be that way, either.
becky | August 28th, 2008 at 11:59 am
Human beings - now there’s a twist.
In my previous job, I was the only person in my position who wasn’t a married guy with two kids who were cared for by their stay-at-home wife. This was almost OK as long as I was childless. But as a single mom with two tots? Forget it.
I knew this going in. It just couldn’t continue.
But, I am not sure that makes it wrong. That environment is perfect for some people. It’s their best opportunity. Who am I to say they shouldn’t have a right to pursue their best opportunity? As long as they aren’t cheating or discriminating (which they were, but that’s another post).
I am incredibly happy now that I’ve put that old life behind me. Meanwhile, there is some young woman or man who is incredibly happy to be starting exactly where I started 13 years ago. May they make the most of this opportunity and then know when it’s time to move on.
SKL | August 28th, 2008 at 2:40 pm
Wow, this kind of suckerpunched me. And made me think of that whole thing we talked about: Do What You Love and The Money Will Follow.
You wouldn’t quit what you love, right?
I don’t know. It’s so damned hard out there.
Kristin D | August 28th, 2008 at 11:15 pm