with Britt Reints
Forget the 9 to 5; Full Time, All the Time is a blog about the mobile working life - when you have the freedom to work from anywhere and the responsibility of always having your smartphone turned on. Britt Reints works as a freelance writer while traveling fulltime in an RV with her husband and two kids. She explores balancing real-life bills with an unconventional work life, and finding time to maintain relationships with family and friends.
You can also find Britt at InPursuitOfHappiness.net.
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Part of my job here is to write about topics that I think other working moms will relate to.
Often times, that means talking about the unique struggles that women who work full time jobs outside of the home face.
Women like to commiserate. It’s part of who we are, and one of the ways we remind ourselves that we are not totally failing at this motherhood gig. Because if someone else is having the same issues, maybe we can ease up on ourselves a bit.
Today I’d like to offer us an opportunity to share in the things we do not suck at.
Let us forget for a moment the times we forgot to bake cookies or return permission slips. Let us not worry about the quality time we might be depriving our children of or the life lessons we might be handling poorly.
Let us, instead, bask in the glow of knowing - beyond a shadow of a doubt - that there are some things we do exceptionally well.
My children know that they are loved.
This is the thing I do best. I hug and I kiss and I overwhelm them with encouraging words. I tell them I am proud of them and that they make my life better.
I was reminded of this recently when my daughter and I were enjoying our morning chit chat while I got ready for work. I told her she needed to brush her teeth, and she turned to leave my bathroom for her own.
“Emma?” I stopped her just before she’d left the doorway.
“I love you, too, Mommy,” she replied. And she skipped off to find her toothbrush, secure in the knowledge that her mother loved her and told her often.
My children know that I am not the only person who loves them.
This is the parenting decision I am most proud of. When I was pregnant with my son, I made a conscious decision to make sure that he knew that he was loved - not just by me, but by tons of people who could offer him security and support if anything should ever happen to me. It is a decision I have acted on over and over again throughout his and his sister’s life.
I have made sure that they have a great relationship with their grandparents, uncles and aunt. I have told them over and over again about all of the ways that different people love them. I have made a point to give them time alone with the other adults who care about them.
We play the “who loves you” game regularly.
“Who loves you?” I ask, usually while squeezing their bodies and nuzzling their necks.
“Mommy does!” they cheer.
“Yep! And who else?” And we spend several minutes listing all of the people in their lives who love them.
It’s important to me that they grow up knowing that they are worthy of love - not just from the people who have to love them because they gave birth to them - but from all of the people who love them just because they deserve to be loved.
I don’t get everything right. I’ve slipped up. I’ve done things I swore I’d never do. I make mistakes constantly as a mother and then worry about the consequences.
But this love thing? I’ve got that down.
What do you do well?
1. That picture is gorgeous.
2. The “Who Loves You” game is awesome.
3. What do I do well? I am always honest with my son; I don’t sugarcoat anything. I’m careful not freak him out, but I never lie. That’s one thing he can always depend on and it’s critical with his issues and all the medical tests, etc.
I use humor very effectively. I know how to make him laugh even when he doesn’t want to. I tease him and joke with him. I make sure that laughter is a big part of his life.
Finn | July 1st, 2009 at 9:03 am
I love this topic, thank you! Seriously, we do enough self-criticizing.
Things I do well as a mom:
I put on a rockin’ dance party in our living room and I’m pretty sure (my husband would argue, but I’d win) that my Oops I did it again Britney dance routine with my daughter is the. very. best. ever.
I think I’m funny and fun. Sure, not when I am totally exhausted, but enough that we laugh every day.
I manage to cook fresh, healthy and tasty meals for my daughter (and us), regardless of how much work I have going on. This is my one thing that I won’t let go and I’m pretty proud of it.
Nataly | July 1st, 2009 at 7:43 pm
Finn - raising another human being who appreciates humor is a service you’re providing the whole world.
Nataly - I am so much in awe of working moms who are still able to be creative in the kitchen. You SHOULD be proud!
Miss Britt | July 2nd, 2009 at 8:51 am
We play the Who Loves You game as well.
What do I do well?
Teaching my daughter independence. Even when it bites me on the @ss. I’d rather she question me than be the sort who goes along with the majority.
Adventuring. I love taking adventures with her. To the park down the street or a beach 2 hours away. Camping with friends or camping with just us. Festivals far and near.
Co-parenting. Even tho it means I have less time with her and have to negotiate every single parenting decision, there is nothing that means more to me as a parent as ensuring she has a MUM and a DAD in equal roles in her life.
bad mummy | July 2nd, 2009 at 4:31 pm