It certainly seems possible that your husband misunderstood (or just just plain ‘missed’) the part about it being for charity, and I certainly don’t think it’s wrong to promote it in the workplace.

You did just exactly what you should have done. Give (or bid) if you feel called to, and don’t if you don’t.

I hope you still had a good time anyways!

I think the workplace should be very supportive of charity and volunteerism, but should not make anyone feel compelled to give.

I used to be on the volunteerism committee at my previous job, and one of the biggest reasons we made an impact is that we really tried to come up with ideas that would work for all different types of people. We listened to the concerns of those who tended to be uninvolved, and tailored programs for them. For example, many employees said they weren’t willing to give up family time with their young kids for a volunteer event. So we planned activities that made wee “volunteers” the focus. For the animal lovers, we planned animal rescue stuff; for folks whose family homes were out of town, we organized “basket projects” where folks could donate items or money; etc. It was very successful - we had 99% participation (all voluntary) the first year. But gradually, the partners withdrew their support. They whined more about the shrinking budget every year, while at the same time pressuring everyone to give more to the United Way in order to make themselves look better. The level of involvement in both volunteering and donating declined accordlingly. I dropped out after years of being berated for spending $1K-$2K on a kids’ party at a children’s home (which was a huge amount of off-the-clock work for me), even though I was expected to give that much personally to the United Way each year. Bah.

The event you describe sounds like one of those where the sponsor, perhaps a board member for the charity, has bought (or gotten his company to buy) a “table” including a number of free tickets. The point of that is really to get bodies in the door to make it feel like a successful and fun event and expose some potential future donors/volunteers to the organization. Nobody who is invited to use the tickets should feel obligated to part with any of their own money. They should enjoy the food/drinks/music and engage socially according to their comfort level. If they desire to do more, that’s great, but it shouldn’t be “expected.” Reality is, most of the expensive auction items will be bought by board members and others who want their names to be prominent on the donor list. But sometimes you can find a great deal in those auctions, so I always take a good look. I guess I’m saying there’s nothing wrong with “inviting” folks to attend your charity event, but “pressuring” them to support a boss’s pet cause with time or money is wrong.