The blogs are buzzing with news about an internal memo announcing changes to the work-from-home policies at Yahoo!, a tech company that has seen more ink dedicated to its CEO than its products in the last year. The gist of the memo is this: all telecommuters must report to Yahoo! offices by June, or quit. The gist of the response in my news and social media feeds: CEO Marissa Mayer is setting back women. Personally, I have more problems with the criticism of the policy than I do with the mandate itself.
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As my colleague Karen pointed out in her post “Why the death of Elizabeth Edwards breaks our hearts”, when we hear of another mother dying, it’s hard not to think about our own mortality.

Specifically, as mothers, we think about leaving our children.  Conversations I’ve had with other moms have revealed that my fears about dying when my children are young are pretty universal: we worry that they’ll need us, that they won’t know how much they were loved by us.  It seems that fear is even greater than the idea of us missing out on the experiences of raising our children.

We want are children to be OK.  We want them to know that they are loved, in a way that only a mother can tell them.

Hearing the news about Elizabeth Edwards and reading subsequent posts has brought that fear to the forefront for me and many other mothers.  Please, we think, please don’t let that be us. But the truth is, as Elizabeth herself pointed out in her last statement on Facebook, all of us know that our days are numbered.  We will, someday, leave behind the people we love most in this world.

The question is not if we’ll die, or even when, but what will we leave behind when that time comes?

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In case you missed the news, the White House is hosting a “Forum on Workplace Flexibility” today.  According to press releases, President Obama and the First Lady are planning to talk about “creating workplace practices that allow America’s working men and women to meet the demands of their jobs without sacrificing the needs of their families.”

In other words - all that stuff we’ve been trying to figure out on our own forever.

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Don’t tell me you have it harder. Or better. Or that you had no choice. Or that you sacrificed. Don’t tell me you’re a working mom or a stay at home one. Frankly, I just don’t care anymore. I’m over it. “It” being the debate in the Mommy Wars.

Opt-in to Motherhood. Opt-out of Work. Opt to whatever works for your family. On-ramp! Off-ramp! On-board! Oh my!

I don’t care. I won’t judge you. We can be friends no matter which side of the aisle you are on. It’s time for bi-partisan mommy peace talks.
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On Monday, The Today Show did a segment on “Digital Moms”.  They featured mommy blogger, Heather Armstrong and the founder of CafeMom.  While these two women did a great job handling the questions and representing their respective web sites, the segment itself didn’t do much to dispel old myths about women.

The impression for many women watching the segment (myself included) was that, once again, women were portrayed as mothers who sit around gossiping with one another about childbirth.  Full stop.

Of course now, and isn’t this cute, we’re doing it on the internet.

The frustrating part is that I see women every day taking advantage of the internet and new technology to do a lot more than chat about motherhood.  Sure, we tend to be social creatures by nature.  And yes, we use blogs and twitter and portal sites like Work It, Mom! to connect with other like minded women.

But we’re doing heck of a lot more than talking about what it’s like to be a mother.

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