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Full Time, All the Time

with Britt Reints

Forget the 9 to 5; the demands of a working mom aren’t limited by a time clock. Full Time, All the Time is a blog about balancing the many roles of a modern woman - and maintaining your wellbeing while doing it. I am a writer, mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend and sometimes volunteer living in Pittsburgh. Oh, and I think you look pretty today.

You can also find Britt on Twitter and at InPursuitOfHappiness.net.

3 Tips for Working Moms to Nurture Friendships

Categories: relationships, working mom

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bffConfession: maintaining friendships is not my strong suit. Left to my own devices, I will get wrapped up in the busyness of my life until months have gone by without my closest friends hearing from me. Fortunately, I have had the pleasure of learning about friendship from some amazing women who are great at keeping in touch and nurturing relationships. I’ve taken some of these lessons and figured out how to maintain friendships no matter how busy (or self absorbed) I get.
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How Do You Find Your “Safe Person”?

Categories: relationships

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Last week, I pre-launched my very first book. Six days later, I woke up in a fog of fear and uncertainty. Despite the fact that Amazon wasn’t officially shipping paperback copies yet - and that I was literally less than a week from my start point - I was terrified that I was failing.

I grabbed my phone and opened up Twitter. I promptly closed it, knowing that “wahhhhhh, not enough people are buying my book!” was not the marketing message I wanted to send. That internal conversation prevented me from even opening Facebook. I rolled over and looked at my still sleeping husband, and I quickly dismissed the idea of waking him up to tell him how scared I was that I was sending our family careening into the poor house.

I walked into my bathroom, closed the door, and called my mom.
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The evolution of a mother

Categories: relationships

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Oh look, one with momI began my journey as a mother at 19 years old. Today, I’m 33 and the mother of two kids: a teenager and an 8 year old. A lot has changed between then and now.

When my son was born, my nightstand was covered in parenting books. I was determined to overcome the judgment I assumed everyone would be making about me as a young mother, and I was certain all those books would help. I followed their advice religiously, leaving very little room for instinct or individualism.
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I don’t have co-workers; I have a community

Categories: office life, relationships

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From My Back YardIn the last month, I’ve worked in a hospital room, at my mother’s kitchen table, from a balcony overlooking a Mexican beach, and in my own living room. My work is location independent, which means I’m free of the confines of a cubicle. It also means I don’t have co-workers in the traditional sense. Sometimes this blows. But as I’ve learned in the face of heartache and disaster over the last few weeks, I am not alone. Far from it, in fact.
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The trouble with mentors… is finding one

Categories: relationships

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Macro - Search ButtonOver at The Cornered Office, Mir recently wrote about healthy boundaries for a mentoring relationship. Her post was, in part, a response to another article on Penelope Trunk’s blog about what good mentoring looks like. While I was intrigued by the ideas put forth in both essays, my strongest reaction was resentment.

I am resentful when I hear other women talk about mentors because I’ve never been able to enlist the help of one myself.
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Am I the only working mom who needs girlfriend time?

Categories: Uncategorized, relationships

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All the lonely people, where do they all come from?As a working mom, it’s important to me to make time and space in my life for quality relationships with my husband and kids. It’s also important to me to make time for friends. Unfortunately, most of my favorite women have a hard time finding time for friendship.

Part of the problem is that the majority of my friends work “real jobs,” which means they aren’t around for coffee or lunch dates during the day. It also means most of their evenings are packed with family fun, dinner, and household chores. That leaves nights after kids are in bed, which is usually spouse time, or weekends, which are often spent at kids’ events or running errands that couldn’t get done during the week. The life of a working mom doesn’t have a lot of room in it for girlfriends.

What are a bunch of working women to do?
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Why we don’t have nice things

Categories: Uncategorized, economy, office life, relationships, the juggle

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Day 21 Occupy Wall Street October 6 2011 Shankbone 16It’s not uncommon to blame children for a couple’s inability to have nice things. My husband and I, however, have no one but ourselves to blame.

A year ago, my husband and I sold just about everything we owned - including our beautiful home and my beloved shoe collection - so that we could move into an RV and travel for a year with our kids. That year of travel has come to an end and we now have room to put stuff again, but we’re not running out to replace all of our stuff. Why? Because we don’t want to go back to real jobs.


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Should you lead with the stick or the carrot?

Categories: office life, relationships, working mom

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I spend a great deal of my life trying to motivate other people to do things.  Whether it’s asking my children to pick up their rooms or encouraging writers to meet deadlines, I’m often relying on other people to do their part to make my day go smoothly.  Such is life when no man (or woman) is an island, I suppose; even the most resourceful and self reliant among us must learn how to inspire action in someone else at some point.

The question is not if we’ll have to motivate others, but how we’ll choose to do it.  Specifically, will we rely on negative or positive reinforcement?


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When do you talk to your spouse?

Categories: balance, relationships

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The summer break is over, our children are home from vacation, and the family is officially back into the routine of a dual income household with two school aged children.

Like most families, we do what we have to do to get everything done.  My husband and I rely on organizational systems that make sense for us, make compromises about what hast to get done and what can wait for another day, and practice a whole lot of cooperation in order to keep everything spinning.

You know what we don’t do?

Talk.


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