My friend Heather is moving across the entire country with children aged almost-3 and almost-5. If I were her I would say that as “ages 2 and 4,” to maximize the Pity Factor.

She is looking for ideas to keep the children entertained on the trip. If your first suggestion is “OMG don’t do it at all! Fly instead!! With the children in animal crates!!” you can save your breath because I already tried it. They will be in the car at least six days, and that is final.

I suggest we see if we can make this easier for her in any way. Donations of prescription medications would be excellent too, but I was thinking more along the lines of travel tips and toy ideas.

My tip, based on taking two much-shorter trips (1.5-days in the car each trip) with a 2-year-old and a newborn, is to plan to stop at places that have a play area or a grassy run-around area, and include in estimated trip time the amount of time it would take for the kids to run/play/climb for 15 minutes or so at each stop. Plus assume triple the number of stops needed with adults. This makes the entire trip take much, much longer.

My second tip is to save some stuff aside and not bring out everything on the first day of travel, or else the children will play frantically with all the toys on the first day and be bored for the rest of the trip. (This is a pointless tip, because if it were me, I’d be desperate enough on the first day to bring out anything, ANYTHING I had.)

Now for things to buy:

1. Fresh TV/movies. Heather tells me that they already have a DVD player for the car, so I suggest buying several new DVDs. …This doesn’t seem like it’s brilliant enough to suggest, but that didn’t stop me from suggesting the kids could run around at rest stops. Blue’s Clues (photo from Amazon.com) is one of the ones I got for the just-turned-2-year-old on my own trip, so it may be too young for the 2- and 4-year-olds—but anything, ANYTHING they would like that wouldn’t be intolerable for the adults.

2. Water-drawing thingie. The H-2 Whoa is the one we had. It’s two-sided, so by the time you finish drawing on the second side, the first side is mostly dry and ready to use again. But if I were buying now, I’d buy the travel-sized Aqua Doodle (photo from Amazon.com). (In fact, I DID buy it, and we still keep it in our car. I like it less because it has pre-printed rainbows/grass on it, which can kind of ruin an outer space drawing. But it IS more sensibly compact.)
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We were recently invited to a birthday party for a 2-year-old, and you know what I don’t remember? What 2-year-olds like. It’s funny how that was only three years ago and yet I had to go back into my journals to find out even what KIND of toy the kids were playing with at that age.

One idea we considered was musical instruments. Several of our kids were invited, so it seemed like a good way to bring a gift from each child: maybe one could bring this cool percussion toy (photo from Amazon.com), and one could bring bendy bells, and one could bring a harmonica and a kazoo.

Or maybe one kid could bring an instrument and one could bring a set of helping/digging garden tools (photo from Amazon.com).
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Last week I wrote about the pirate-related ideas I was considering for Henry’s birthday. This week: knights.

Schylling Sword and Shield Set (photo from Amazon.com). Henry picked this out. Does he care that he already has a couple of sword and shield sets? No. Does he care that he can’t choose the image on the shield among four possibilities? No. Does he care that the next item on his list ALSO includes a sword and shield? No. he says raptly, “Oooo, I don’t have a WOODEN one yet!!”

Small World Toys Black Knight Set (photo from Amazon.com). Henry wants this more than anything else on his list. At my mom’s house he plays with a castle and knight set, and his favorite guy is one he calls Shadow—a black-armored knight. This costume would let him play Being Shadow.
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I am getting ready for Henry’s 5th birthday. I wouldn’t say I’m feeling morose about it per se, but I keep thinking of a science fiction short story I read a long time ago where male children were taken away on their 5th birthdays and educated all in one single day by a brain implant sort of system, so that they returned at the end of that day fully adult, not needing their mothers, and chatting with their fathers about office stuff. No moroseness, though.

This year Henry claims to be done with dinosaurs. He likes knights, and he likes pirates.

And he likes walruses. This is not something I would have guessed about him. But a couple of months ago I was at Hallmark buying postcards to support my Postcrossing.org addiction obsession issue hobby, and I walked down the clearance aisle, and I ended up with an impulse-buy walrus: a little beanie-baby-sized guy. I’d planned to put him in with a care package, but the minute I showed the walrus to Henry, Henry was squeezing it and cuddling it and wrapping it in a blankie and pretending to give it a bottle. So for his birthday, I got him a Cuddlekin Walrus (photo from Amazon.com). Cuddlekin is probably my top favorite stuffed animal line: they are not kidding one bit about the cuddliness. If the walrus not a hit with Henry, I’ll snuggle it myself.

My parents bought Henry the Melissa and Doug Pirate Chest (photo from Amazon.com), with extra coins. (My mom checked with me first, because she knows and I know that those coins are going to end up in every single corner and under every single piece of furniture in the house. I don’t mind. Treasure hunt! And it’s not as if all of those locations aren’t currently occupied by playing cards, paper clips, toys from gumball machines, toothpicks, checkers, rubber balls that got away, etc.)
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Tara writes:

My daughter is OBSESSED with music (and noise in general), and currently her instruments of choice are two metal mixing bowls she drums on with bamboo spoons, but she also really loved a little piano at a friend’s house. We are celebrating her in June (when she’ll be 18 months), and I’ve been thinking about getting her some baby/toddler instruments! Any ideas (preferably that won’t cost me $1M)?

I bought a set of Schylling Musical Hand Bells for my niece for Christmas, and they have been a success. Each bell makes an actual note (the note is labeled on the handle with a sticker, which may need to be replaced by permanent marker), so an older child can use them for reals after using them for just-shake-those-bells-any-which-way play as a younger child.

My brother is very musical (I am more the sort who gets completely stumped as soon as flats/sharps are introduced), and I remember him asking for Music Eggs one Christmas. They’re a….rhythm instrument, I think.
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The first year we did Easter at our house, Rob was 2 years old and very into rabbits. VERY into rabbits. Soooooooooo into rabbits. He hadn’t been very into stuffed animals yet (he was a blankie type), but we were pretty sure he’d flip over a stuffed rabbit. So we bought him one, and it was the love of his life. And I SO WISH I could still find those same rabbits, because we bought him three more of them over the years (one brown, one brown-and-cream, one black) and they are just the BEST rabbits: just the right amount of beans for weight, just the right amount of flop for putting over your shoulder like burping a baby, just the right amount of realistic for a child who was a little strict about realism.

Wait. Wait wait wait. Hold the phone. I think I know one more place to check for them. …YES. YES!!! Toys R Us online still has them!! I can’t believe it! Do you think they’d be the same as before? I haven’t bought one for probably 8 or 9 years! But they LOOK similar! (It is a little hard to compare, now that ours have been loved grubby and thin.)

This is the white one we bought him for that first Easter, and this is the brown-and-cream one we bought him, probably for Christmas or his next birthday, after the first one was such a hit. (Both photos from ToysRUs.com. They don’t seem to have the black or brown anymore.) I’m not POSITIVE they’re the same, not without picking them up and evaluating them for heft and flop, but they look like they’d be good bunnies either way. And they’re buy-1-get-1-50%-off, so that’s $16.50 for two of them.

Anyway. At our house we are now at the point where we have to consider a new stuffed animal almost as seriously as we’d consider a new child: Can our household support yet another stuffed animal? Do we have a place for it, even theoretically? But if you are not at that point, the classic stuffed bunny does make such a nice Easter basket filler—especially if you’re looking for fewer candy options.
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Well, or gift ideas for an 11-year-old girl, or for a 10- or 12-year old boy or girl, probably, but it is an 11-year-old boy I am shopping for, and the other title would be too long.

William is nearly 11, and one of the challenges in shopping for him is that he has many interests and they change fast: he’ll practice magic tricks obsessively and daily, and then abruptly move on to something new. Another challenge is that our town has a “One Man’s Trash” shed—a place where people can leave things they don’t want, and other people can take them for free. William has had remarkable success there and is continually coming home with the very things we were considering buying for his birthday or for Christmas: a pottery wheel! candles for his endless candle-burning interest! a pet triops! magic tricks! a terrarium kit! a chemistry set!

Well. We’ve explained to him that it’s possible he will be disappointed with his birthday gifts if he (1) suddenly switches gears or (2) comes home with the item from the Trash Shed. Here’s what we’re hoping he’ll still like/want when it’s his birthday:

Magnet Balls (photo from Amazon.com). Oh, man, do your kids have these? They’re also sold as Bucky Balls or Magnicube. We got him the particular set I’m linking to because he’d already saved his allowance and bought a set of them, and he’s saving for a second, matching set. He bought them about a month ago (after waiting a couple of years to be allowed to buy them: magnets are so dangerous if more than one is swallowed, so it wasn’t until Henry was four and a half that I said yes to the purchase), and I’m not sure they’ve been out of his hands since. They’re TINY: 216 of them takes up about the same amount of space as a golf ball.

Crazy Aaron’s Thinking Putty (photo from Amazon.com).
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When I was little, every Valentine’s Day morning there was a box of conversation hearts at our place at the table. I loved that, and so I wanted to find something to do for my own kids each year. I tried the conversation hearts, but the kids didn’t really like the taste. I tried making heart-shaped pancakes, but that ended in a temper tantrum. (Mine. It turns out I am more the sort of person who serves cereal in heart-shaped bowls.) I tried small boxes of chocolates (the kind made for kids, with a puppy or a panda or whatever on the heart-shaped front, and 4-6 pieces of chocolate inside), but the chocolates weren’t very yummy even for children.

One year I was out shopping before Valentine’s Day and the couple of kids with me went NUTS over the giant Hershey Kisses at the store. I went back later secretly and bought one for each kid, and they loved them, so that’s what I’ve done every year since—even now that they’re marked “#1 Teacher,” which, if you ask me, and I realize you haven’t, is a silly and limiting thing to do.

But perhaps your child responds to giant Hershey Kisses the way mine did to the boxes of assorted chocolates. Or perhaps your child has allergies, or gets too many candies from the classroom exchange already, or already gets the giant Hershey Kiss from the grandparents. In that case, I have some other, non-food ideas.

Melissa and Doug Heart Beads Set (photo from Amazon.com). (That one looks like it’s about to sell out; here’s another option, and another.)

Human Anatomy Heart (photo from Amazon.com). Ha ha, gross. But for the right child, this would be hilarious and awesome. (Here’s another option.)
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For Henry, age 4: Knight and Dragon 36-piece puzzle (photo from Amazon.com). Note that the box is (1) cute, (2) an impractical but fun shape, and (3) not a match to the puzzle. Whatever, I like it and it has the right number of pieces and he loves knights.

Melissa and Doug Pirate Costume (photo from Amazon.com). My parents are giving Henry this. We have the Knight Costume, and it was so much better-quality and more awesome than I’d expected. (I’d been picturing a Halloween costume, made of thin icky material that tears after one use. BUT NO: it’s like what you’d find in a classroom dress-up box.)
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I’ve been shopping for toys for my niece and nephew, and I accidentally got sucked down a Gorgeous Toys wormhole. My kids are all out of the baby/toddler-toy stage, and a LOT of their toys are UGLY and PLASTICKY. Feast your eyes on THESE riches instead:

Small Rainbow Stacker (photo from Amazon.com)

Plan Toys Balancing Cactus (photo from Amazon.com). I saw this in Ann Wyse’s gift post and SWOONED.
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