When I was a kid my parents worked weekends. My dad at his second job and my mom worked nights in a hospital. They worked their schedules out so that every other weekend my two younger sisters and I spent the weekend with my grandma. This allowed my grandmother to have a lot of influence on me. She tried to convince my younger sister and I that our beloved cousins in San Antonio never fought; unlike us who held championship matches almost every day. But the one lesson that stuck with me, even if I didn’t live it, was this – Boys can wait, education first, get a job, and then find a boyfriend.

Michelle Obama certainly lead her life with this mantra, that is until she met Barack. “Michelle was full of plans that day, on the fast track, with no time, she told me, for distractions — especially men.” He has freely admitted that Michelle is the one who put her career on a mommy-track (not that her career looks anything like the typical mommy-track, mind you, just next to Barack’s career) for the kids sake, for his career sake. And now she is to be the next First Lady.

But is that a demotion? Some think it might be. Some are just upset that Michelle’s accomplishments aren’t as widely known as Barack’s. And then there are others who slapped themselves on the forehead when Michelle uttered the phrase, “Mom in Chief.” *raising my hand in guilt*

I was expecting Michelle to take to the First Lady position with the same passion she showed on the campaign trail, with the same passion she showed earlier this year when speaking about work/life issues. I guess I was expecting Michelle to do what I think I would do if given the chance to have the world’s biggest soap box as a job.

Then reality sets in…the kids. Oh, us moms are suckers for our kids. Yes, I hope that Michelle pulls a Helen Santos and makes Barack tour the DC school system with her, but alas, it looks doubtful. Ah, Helen Santos…I wonder what you would tell Michelle. But back to the kids. Someone has to raise them and it can’t just be Grandma, who is expected to move into the White House as well.

And that’s really it, isn’t it? Who will raise the kids? Who will make the sacrifice necessary for the children to turn out normal despite being crowned as our princesses? With the celeb magazines and offers to appear on TV shows, who will keep the weeMichelles’ feet on the ground?

Back in college my husband and I made a pact to take turns being in the lead. If I had gotten into graduate school for biology, he would have followed. Since I didn’t, we essentially had a race to see who would get the “real/dream job” and settle us. He won that race and I passed on a job in DC. Since then we’ve gone back and forth between who is the breadwinner, who does the cleaning, and who stays home to take care of the sick child. It’s not quite 50/50 in our home, but we take turns. But how do you take turns while living in the White House?

I think that no matter what plans you have, decisions you make, someone’s career will take off. Sometimes it is as deliberate as Barack Obama’s career. Sometimes it is more luck. And with that, someone will be trailing, following, and putting away the butter even after you’ve asked them three times to put it back. Sometimes it’s as tiny as one partner is made manager while the other enjoys staying on the line, doing their job without the added responsibility of making sure others do theirs. It’s rare for careers in a family to be at the same level all the time.

I’ve been told that the reason why women live longer is that we have to wait longer to get going on our own lives. It’s amazing how often that seems to be true.