On Father’s Day Illinois Sentor Barack Obama returned to church by attending the Apostolic Church of God and giving a sermon on fatherhood. Here in Chicago the local news outlets are reporting that it was similar to Bill Cosby’s fatherhood sermons/lectures that he’s been giving for years. In other words, the lectures are for African-American men only.
I am aunt to two beautiful, intelligent, and fabulous nephews who don’t have active fathers. Both of my parents were fatherless and not by the choice of my grandmothers. And I’m not African-American. While I know that Obama also used this sermon to reengage the Black church scene, I do wish he had given this in a non-church setting or a non-ethnic centric setting because I want his message of “We need fathers to realize that responsibility does not end at conception. We need them to realize that what makes you a man is not the ability to have a child. It’s the courage to raise one.” to resonate across race lines to Latinos, Caucasians, and everyone else. I’m sure each of us of a different hue and background can think of one missing father.
Then I consider Amy Richards’ life story. In her recent book Opting In: Having a Child Without Losing Yourself, [buy at WCF, Powell's, Amazon] she mentions several times that she has never known her father. I recently saw her discussing her book and she talked about how her mother left her father and that he ended up being arrested a few times over the years for kidnapping young boys. She has made the leap from kidnapping to more nefarious activities and decided that she is actually better off not knowing him. Consider all the moms who leave their abusive husbands - The kids must be better off without their fathers.
Men’s Rights groups and their brother Father’s Rights groups would like to bundle all feminists as being anti-father. What else could we be when we demand that men pay child support that actually supports the child? What I think confuses them is the fact that feminists see both sides. We see the value of a dad in a heterosexual household - IF IT BENEFITS THE CHILD. We also know that, like Amy Richards, having dad kicked to the curb isn’t always something to cry about. Of course there are same-sex couples. Yeah, we support them too because well, we’d rather focus on having love in a home than different genders. And logically this means that if we support lesbian families we hate fathers. *eye roll* Not to mention our support of single women choosing to become mothers via sperm donation.
Here me now and believe me later…Feminists want loving families. That’s it.
This feminist has an awesome guy in her life who is “the bestest dad in the whole world!” as our daughter told him several times on Father’s Day. My wish is that every dad who is in the home be an active dad. The days of just bringing home the bacon are over. My wish is that every time a child is born that a great father is as well. I wish all the single moms, whether by chance or choice, a Happy Father’s Day for filling both roles. And to the lucky moms who also have “bestest fathers” as your partners in this crazy thing called parenting, I hope our luck keeps up!
Ah, the Monday after New Year’s. The day when most kids are headed back to the classroom and parents head back to their offices (whether or not they are in their PJs). The holidays are past us, we’re scraping the bottom of the cookie tin, and wondering if we really are going to use that Wii Fit to lose weight (I wouldn’t know, we’re Wii-free). But let’s grab another cuppa coffee/tea/chai and head into the new year with gusto. Yes, let’s Work it, Moms!
I read the line about five times before it sunk in…
This site is called “Work it, Mom!” and the tag line says, “a place where working moms connect/de-stress/share advise/find support.” Does that mean that we are only a place for 40-hour working outside the home moms? I say no.
The basis for tome’s like 
