Viewing category ‘new baby’

Not Cinderella's Stepmom

with Samantha

I'm a dreamer, writer and actor obsessed with classic television, lace, baking and quoting Ace Ventura (one of these things is not like the other). I like to believe that my life is just like a Disney movie with an Alan Menken soundtrack except the stepmom's not so evil. When I married my husband, David, in October of 2012, I fell madly, deeply in love with my two stepchildren, Chloe and Trey. It's incredibly hard to balance being a stepmom every other weekend with the rest of my life, but it is 100% worth it. You can find more stories about my family at my personal blog, fairytangles!

How To Not Get Overwhelmed With Baby Gear

Categories: baby gear, new baby, new mom

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A few weeks ago, I wrote about the early stages of baby planning, and how I was learning to chill out about picking the absolute perfect swing, highchair, play mat, etc. I realized that I had plenty of time to pick these items out and then Amazon reviews were not the answer to everything.

And then I decided to make a list of the baby gear I would eventually need… and I got overwhelmed all over again.

If you check out any registry “checklist”, your eyes might blur together like mine did in a fit of panic. There are the categories, which seem simple enough at first, like strollers, diapering, bathing, feeding, etc. But then you realize that each category has a sub-category. So strollers aren’t just strollers anymore. You can’t just put “stroller” at the top of your wish list. You need to decide if you want one with an accompanying car seat, one that rear-faces or forward-faces, one that comes with an entire travel system, one that’s just lightweight, one that’s nothing but a frame, and then there are stroller accessories.

Oh you guys. I think I’m going to be sick. And that’s just ONE category.
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Why My Love for My Stepkids Has Changed

Categories: children, new baby, new mom, parenting, stepmom

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I feel like I could go on for hours about what it feels like to be a stepmom and expecting my very first baby, but I know everyone’s not that interested. Instead, people want to know what the kids think of their expected sibling (They are both SO excited!), how I think they’ll transition (Fabulously, I hope) and if I will feel differently towards them once the new baby is here.

Before, my answer was a resounding NO. I will love my stepchildren the exact same way I always have. My love for them will not alter a bit and, if anything, I’m worried I’ll show more love towards them than my own child.

Well… I’m here to tell you that this is no longer the case. My love for my stepchildren? Yep, it’s already changed.

Let me explain! When I became a stepmom, I had an instant connection with my stepkids. We were close, I immediately filled in the “mom” role when they were in our home, and our family was strong from the beginning. There was no awkward first weeks, there was no fighting or resisting the family change… it was seamless. It went off without a hitch, and all I knew was that my heart was now stretching to fill two little people that I just met.

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What’s With These Extra Pregnant Emotions?

Categories: new baby, new mom, pregnancy

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I’ve always been a fairly sensitive person. I’ve been known to get teary-eyed during a particularly touching movie scene (When Forrest Gump breaks out of his leg braces anyone?) and cry over things like when my husband proposed to me. But pregnancy has added an entire extra level of emotional distress.

You guys. I sobbed my way through an entire episode of “American Idol”. I burst into tears during a moment on “Modern Family”, but my crowning “sadness achievement” was when I straight up had a meltdown over an episode of “The Brady Bunch”.

I need help.

They say that all of the extra hormones and emotional outbursts are normal, I know, but it doesn’t make them any easier to handle. In fact, my husband has had the hardest time with this pregnancy symptom. The poor guy has no idea what the hell I’m crying about and, bless him, he does everything he can to help. But I can’t count the number of times he’s simply rolled over and said, “Well… okay. Wake me up if you need me, I guess.”

Oh sweet husband.

The best way to work through these emotions, I’m learning, is just to let them happen. Don’t try and keep things bottled in, don’t try to ignore them, don’t try to will them away. Just cry. Let those emotions take over because as fast as they happened? That’s how fast they seem to go away. I can sob for a good four minutes, but then I’m fine. Everything is bright and rosy again.

Especially my runny nose.

I’ve also had to learn that whatever I’m crying over is not really the “source”. My husband may have said something he thought was funny and sent me into an emotional tailspin, but his “joke” wasn’t the issue. In fact, I think it’s taken him a while to learn this, too. He’s stopped getting quite so defensive over the things he says, and has chalked it up to his normally sweet-tempered, somewhat-emotionally-balanced wife having a case of the WACKADOO.

(This has become a permanent addition to our family’s dictionary, by the way.)

God, postpartum recovery is going to be FUN, isn’t it?

If you dealt with extreme pregnancy emotions, how did you navigate the outbursts? Did you allow them to happen and deal with the aftermath? How did your husband handle it?

I’m Worried I’ll Love My Stepchildren More

Categories: children, coparenting, new baby, pregnancy, stepmom

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Being a stepparent means following a lot of “rules” society has set forth. You know the ones I’m talking about:

Be nice to your stepkids’ mom.

Be nice to your stepkids.

Oh, and the biggest rule of all: Don’t treat your stepchildren differently when you have children of your own.

Seems like a no-brainer, right? But, I can understand why people would have trouble with their stepchildren relationships once a child of their own is in the picture. However, I see it from the opposite side because… well… confession?

I’m terrified that I will love my stepchildren more than I love my own child.

Wait! Hear me out! I know I sound crazy, but when my own husband has confessed to feeling the same, I get a little bit of validation.
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