with Talyaa Liera
I'm Talyaa, the poster child for the concept that there's no one right way to be a parent. I went from stay-at-home attachment-parenting mom of four to being the non-custodial parent, working as a professional writer and channel-psychic. Let's talk about throwing away the parenting manual and exploding the myths and mystique of motherhood!
Check out my personal blog at Juxtapositioning.
For all the years my kids lived with me, I sucked at holidays. I did them wrong. Totally wrong.
Wait. Actually, no, that’s not right. I did not suck. I rocked the holidays. I was Martha freaking Stewart. Stabbing out my eyeballs with a glue gun to the tune of “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.”
If I had to do it over I would do holidays differently. I know exactly how it would go down. I would only need to change one thing. If I had known this at the time — that changing just ONE FREAKING THING would make all the difference and would turn a stress-filled eye-stabbing wine-gulping gray-hair-creating holiday into glittery chocolate-covered elf sparkles, than I would probably be a gazillionaire by now.
But since I am not a gazillionaire, and instead I am selling off the toys of my expensive past-life road bike hobby to pay rent, I will let you in on my secret to a rocking holiday.
Lower your expectations.
That’s it. Just take expectations to absolute zero rock bottom and let them stay there and hang out until New Year’s Day. Here’s why, the bullet point version:
- Less stress
- Way less work
- Probably costs less
- Can’t fail
- More singing
- Kids sleep better
- Heck, YOU sleep better (win)
- Freedom to create new rituals/throw out old ones
- There’s probably cake
- Memorable. Trust me.
- Way more fun
But hey, you are probably way ahead of me here. Maybe you did this years ago. I wish, the year I was driving all over Boulder Colorado on Christmas Eve to every candy store within 50 miles to find FOIL-WRAPPED CHOCOLATE SANTAS (they had to be a certain kind), that either
a) I had been successful in the glue gun eye stab, or
b) that someone had clued me in to the little secret that this stuff just didn’t matter. That I could stop sweating the small stuff. That I could relax on the memory-making and concentrate on the experience.
I wish someone had told me this. But they didn’t, so I am telling you now. But again, I bet you are way ahead of me. I’d love to know what you do in your house to dial down the holidays, relax expectations, and have more fun.
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