Ashley Stone is the wife of one, mother of two and the voice of Our Family Stone. She’s tried writing her bio 10 times and has discovered 2 things, 1. she talks/writes to much & 2. She should really just stop at “Hi”. So, “Hi”
A friend of mine posted a picture of a quote awhile back that sums it up wonderfully: “A perfect parent is a person with excellent child rearing theories, and no actual children.” True story, right? Whether you have 1, 2 or 25 kids, you know that the perfect parent doesn’t exist. She is the myth that keeps mothers up at night, leaves fathers feeling inadequate and is the thing that sells millions and millions of parenting books each year.
At least, the universal “Perfect Parent” for every kid doesn’t exist. There is however there is a “Perfect Parent” for your kids, and I think you’re going to find (if you don’t already know it), that it’s you!
1. The Perfect Parent loves her children. Period. The perfect parent loves her kids whether they are snuggling on the couch or wailing in time out, when she’s laughing with them and when she’s crying over them, when they’re cleaning their toys and when she’s silently counting down the minutes till bedtime. You don’t have to always like their behavior to love them. It doesn’t have to be all Mary Poppins every moment of the day because you love them, you know you do. And so do they! It’s in your hugs and kisses, in bedtime stories and clean laundry. It’s in time outs and “eat your dinners!” Loving your kids is the easiest and sometimes the hardest part of this job called parenting, but it never changes, and it won’t ever go away.
2. The Perfect Parent knows all about broccoli, spinach, spiderman or Dora. She knows the things that make her kids tick and those that don’t. She remembers that kid #1 LOVES to eat her hotdog with plain bun and ketchup to dip it in, while kid #2 needs a puddle of Ranch dressing for the dipping of everything. She knows that Spiderman is also Peter Parker and that Boots is a monkey, not just footwear. She knows the things that matter, the ones that don’t and everything in between. It’s in that remembering that her children feel loved, they feel important and they feel respected.
3. The Perfect Parent lets her kids see her fall. If you’ve ever shouted over spilled milk, locked yourself in the bathroom just to breath (or pee alone!) or said something you regret you’ve just given your children a gift. It’s in your imperfection (and often the time it takes to apologize to them later about it – which I believe is KEY) that they see the real. They see that it’s ok to make mistakes, because even mommies make mistakes. Kids spend a good majority of their childhood making mistakes and learning from them, sometimes it makes them feel like failures. But when they see you fall and get back up again, they have hope. They see that mistakes are forgiven and that the world didn’t end, and maybe that means they’re not failures after all. Maybe that means they’re “perfect” too! dinner or staying up past bedtime, the perfect parent trades in the rules for fun once in a while. Sometimes it’s in those broken or forgotten rules that we make the biggest memories, teach the deepest lessons and a laugh till we cry. It’s also when we find the good after a long hard day and where WE find the strength to face whatever tomorrow’s going to bring.
4. The Perfect Parent sometimes forgets the rules. Whether it’s ice cream for dinner or staying up past bedtime, the perfect parent trades in the rules for fun once in a while. Sometimes it’s in those broken or forgotten rules that we make the biggest memories, teach the deepest lessons and a laugh till we cry. It’s also when we find the good after a long hard day and where WE find the strength to face whatever tomorrow’s going to bring.
5. The Perfect Parent knows that she’s got no idea what she’s doing. But she gets up each and every day to do her best. She’ll tell you that she’s winging this parenting gig, she has no secrets or magic keys, she fails more than she succeeds some days and she aches to do better. But she’ll also tell you her children are happy, they are loved, they are cherished, they are safe and they are hers. She’ll tell you that no matter what you see on TV, or read in a magazine, or find on the internet, nobody has all the answers. Then she’ll tell you that, that’s ok. She doesn’t need all the answers, she just needs her kids, she needs their hugs and their love, their kisses and their giggles, their smelly farts and their “Buy WHY?”s because that’s what makes her the perfect parent, the perfect kids for her.
What makes YOU the “Perfect Parent” for your kids?
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