This year is shaping up to be one where I’m really working on deciding what has a place in my life and what doesn’t. The decluttering of the house is going well. Our home office is better today than it has been in months, and other than a few dirty dishes (which I will tackle in a few minutes), and some toys on the floor, the house is actually in order. It’s interesting that my New Year’s resolution was to have a more organized house, but I think what I really wanted was a more organized life.

Yesterday I was working on dishes when my daughter turned on the TV. Blaring in the background was the voice of Suze Orman talking about the 8 characteristics of a wealthy woman. What really caught my attention was her description of generosity. Now I’m paraphrasing here, so don’t quote me. Her definition was that true generosity only happens when both the giver and the receiver gain a benefit from the service. She explained that being generous is one thing that women find too easy. We give so much of ourselves that many times there is nothing left over.

I started running through all of the different things that I tend to do that are not being generous to myself. Some of them I’ve already remedied. In the past few weeks of working on the organization resolution I’ve realized that one problem that I have is that I try to fit too much into a day. There is no way that I can clean the entire house, run all the errands, work, do three loads of laundry, and cook three meals in one day. That’s ridiculous and what ends up happening is that I commit to doing all the running around and cooking and throw things around in order to get out the door. Only agreeing to doing bite-sized chunks in a day is a gift to myself and the other person that I’m doing it for (whether it’s for our family, my employer, or for the families that I help with my volunteer work).

In addition to over-scheduling myself, I recognized that I’ve also been short changing myself on my “me time”. I have three sources of me time: blogging on my personal blog, crafting, and bubble baths. I like them all equally, depending on the time of day and my mood. Well, the last few weeks have been really busy and I’ve had little time to do any of them, and one big reason for this is that my extra computer time has been taken up with other personal correspondence. I’ve been starting to resent the people that have been emailing me (I know, not very gracious). I realized though, after listening to Suze, that I don’t have to feel guilty if I decide to not write long winded personal responses. I am allowed to write a few sentences and not repeat all of the news that I would rather be writing on my blog anyway. This kind of guilt is really clutter too, and I don’t have to hang onto it if it makes me feel bad.

How do you deal with emotional clutter? Any suggestions for letting it go?