I love a little bling; I’m all about wearing sequins for the school drop and piling on the necklaces for a grocery store run. But I am baffled by the ongoing popularity of embellished jeans.
Unless you are an actual rodeo queen, you do not need all that going on behind you. And if you are an actual rodeo queen, I have to wonder if it’s really comfortable to ride a horse with your backside all bedazzled like that.
Let’s go in for a closer look, shall we?
Here’s the thing about jeans with any sort of embellishment on the back pockets: your eye is drawn immediately to that spot, always. It’s the same principle as wearing a statement necklace or a striking pair of earrings or, heck, a tiara — we look at the sparkly stuff. But in this case, the sparkly stuff is on your derriere. Which means that’s where everyone is looking.
If you’re Pippa Middleton, that’s fine. The rest of us, though, would probably prefer that people look us in the face and not gaze at our bums.
Rhinestones, like flap pockets, inevitably make your tush look bigger, and while I know there are girls who lament their pancake bottoms, most of us are trying to play down the junk in our trunks. Blinging out your backside is not the way to do that.
So please, women of America, stop with the bedazzled jeans — and, while I’m at it, get rid of those sweat pants with the writing across the backside. Give your bum the respect it deserves and cover it with a pair of properly fitting, plain-pocket jeans — and save the glitz for your top half.
Are embellished jeans a trend where you live, or is this specific to the Great State of Oklahoma (and our neighbor Texas, and probably Arkansas as well)?
Miss Me Jeans, $109 at Macy’s
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