Work It, Dad!
with Avi Spivack
Hi, I'm Avi, and I try to put the work and the dad together, with mild success. This is all about trying to give you a view from what it looks like on the dad-man's side of the world, and I hope you find my ruminations humorous because I try not to take myself too seriously.
Well, I am happy (and mostly relieved) to say that I am finally back in the employment saddle (starting Monday) after a not-so-fun 3+ months (which is the understatement of the year).
So instead of reflecting on the time I spent digitally networking and wearing the same dress pants for 4 interviews in a row (because I thought they were lucky), I am thinking about how our family coped with this disruption and how we will be happy to return to our family’s routine.
By nature I am neither organized nor tidy, but being married to a highly organized and clean (and amazing) woman has transformed me (a little bit). So while I never thought that maintaining a routine - daily and weekly - would be of importance, it turns out that keeping structure in our daily life amidst the insanity was very important.
We may be more set in a routine than others, but just as our daughter grew out of her “chaotic” infant months by finally conforming to a set nap and feeding schedule, we tried to simulate the “normal” daily routine in terms of who drops off and picks up our daughter from school, who is around in the house, etc. And the funny thing is that because of this, our daughter didn’t know I wasn’t working (being not quite 5 was helpful), and it made the whole situation somehow less mentally taxing.
And on Monday I will go back to the pre-layoff daily grind, with all of its annoyances, but I have a newfound appreciation both for being employed and for my wife, who ensured that we retained our routine over the past 3 months, and it was imperative.
What is your family’s schedule and is it mission critical to keep everything running smoothly in the daily juggle?
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Interesting.
Two years ago, when pregnant w/my second child, I went on maternity leave four months before I was due. And we stuck to the same routine. My husband still took my son to school every morning even though I was home. And now that I work from home, it’s still the same. We stuck to the same routine, mainly because our son was used to having daddy take him to school and he didn’t want anything to change.
vera babayeva | March 28th, 2009 at 6:57 pm
I think routines are key with babies and toddlers. It helps them understand what’s expected of them. We’d do the same steps when we put the kids down for a nap and down to bed each day. They definitely knew it was time for sleep and not for playing. That helped me and my husband have some much needed quiet time in the evening.
Grace | March 31st, 2009 at 3:20 am
My teen has Asperger’s (high functioning autism), so routine is essential. Too much deviation or freedom causes him to fall apart. He is a news junky, too: he actually asked me if there was a danger of my being laid off. He’d heard stories of teacher layoffs on the TV and radio news, and he was worried.
I give you credit for keeping the worries of unemployment away from your child. At her age, it would be really hard to understand.
Daisy | April 3rd, 2009 at 7:57 pm