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with Nataly
Hi, I am Nataly and I am the co-founder of Work It, Mom!
I write the daily Work It, Mom! Blog where I talk about issues affecting working moms, goings on in our Work It, Mom! community, new site features, updates,and contests. I also share my own juggle between work and family and love to see members jump in with comments. Come and visit often!
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How far will you go to de-stress when taking care of your kids?
Categories: Balancing Act, Parenting & Family, Your life
An article on Babble.com is causing a whirlwind of discussion online. In it, a mom talks about smoking pot while taking care of her son. To be clear, she describes taking one hit of pot while out at the mall with her son. Nevertheless, she admits to being high and less stressed out as the result.
Ignoring for a moment the many comments in the discussion that suggest that this article was just a piece of fiction written to stir up controversy, do you think this is a horrible and irresponsible thing to do? As working moms, we are always stressed out to the max - and we’ve all had those desperate moments when we don’t think we can deal with it. What do you do to help you get through them?
Experts suggest asking for help from family and friends or doing things like yoga or meditation on a regular basis to reduce overall stress. I’ll be honest and say that I do a lot of this (Pilates instead of yoga and walking instead of meditation) and my stress level is still generally very high. Have you come up with other ways to cope?
A while back the New York Times published an article about moms who drink during playdates. It caused quite a stir. Many moms responded by saying how irresponsible this is; many thought that having a glass of wine while watching your kids is perfectly acceptable. As with anything, it seems that it’s a matter of degree - having one glass is fine, getting drunk on several is not.
Where do you stand on this? Is smoking pot worse than drinking a glass of wine while watching your kids? Is either acceptable at all? Speak out!
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Hi!
WOW! I can see why there is a ton of commotion!!
Who wants to think anyone watching children is taking a hit
or bending the elbow?
Would you want someone who was babysitting your kids to do that?
Not to mention that the kids will probably learn from that example!
NO
WAY!!
When a woman believes she has to resort to narcotics or alcohol
to relax it is a clue that her life is probably out of balance.
in more ways than one.
As a “refreshing” life coach, I get to work
with working moms who are soooooo tired and
burned out.
While a quick fix might SEEM like a short cut,
there are soooo many healthy ways to revitalize
and they will not only perk you up, but
help your work productivity, too.
“Your best ideas and most profound insights
come after a period of rest and relaxation.”
says B. Tracy.
What are some quick, easy-to-do but very powerful
methods of refreshing relaxation you can try?
It really depends on what is stressing you out and what
you feel comfortable doing. Here are just a few ideas I like
to try…
* Splash cold water on your face.
* Spend a few minutes with your pet (I love to pet my dogs!)
* Turn on your favorite music.
* TURN OFF THE T.V.!
* Invite the kids to go on a nature walk.
* Swing at the park while your kids play.
What works for you??
Talk to you soon!
Annemarie
Annemarie | August 11th, 2007 at 7:18 pm
I have been known to have a cocktail with dinner…even when Amara is present. I’ve drank when I’ve gotten together with other moms and their children. But one Mandarin and Seven is different than one hit of pot. My drink is legal. I do not break the law nor do I abuse alcohol, especially in front of my child.
I agree with Nataly - I do yoga and while I’m relaxed for those two hours during class, life is still hectic. But at least I’m making time for me. And I look forward to those precious minutes of peace.
amaras_mom | August 11th, 2007 at 7:30 pm
Hi,
I think it’s great that you are making time for you
and enjoying moments of peace.
Annemarie | August 12th, 2007 at 12:14 am
Yikes. Well, at a very base and simplistic level I’d have to say that one hit vs. one drink is a no-brainer simply because one is illegal and one is not.
And that’s as far into that quagmire as I’m willing to wade.
Mir | August 13th, 2007 at 8:23 am
It’s tough if there is no family who lives near to help, or if the ones who do can’t or won’t (all three describe my situation). Pot? That’s a new one, but I’m not beyond a tiny glass of Chardonnay while I’m making dinner!
PunditMom | August 13th, 2007 at 9:47 am
Hi,
When I wrote my first response to Nataly’s blog, I was imaging
the “what if” I walked in on my babysitter ( a mom, too) and she was taking a hit (later sporting a mug shot) or GUZZLES from a 100% proof bottle (i.e. bending the elbow), and was sauced in front of the kids!
Legal, “responsible” drinking is another story… whew.
I may have come across too strongly, I’m sorry.
It was the mama bear in me
Happy Relaxing Everybody!!!
Talk to you soon,
Annemarie
Annemarie | August 13th, 2007 at 4:34 pm
I am with the others who have pointed out that pot is illegal– having a drink is not (well, assuming you are of age).
I am not opposed to having a drink in my own home when my children are awake. I wouldn’t get drunk though. And pot? is out.
Jen Creer | August 13th, 2007 at 7:14 pm
A close friend has this saying posted: “Do not worry that your children are not listening to what you say. Worry that they are watching everything you do.” Taking a hit to alleviate stress is showing your child that it’s okay to do something illegal if it makes you feel better.
Daisy | August 13th, 2007 at 7:19 pm
I could not imagine someone doing any kind of drugs in front of their children! Why would someone be so irresponsible? Is that the kind of life they’d want for their kids? Thankfully, my better half and I have never EVER taken any drugs and both feel 100% against them. Having a drink is completely different. For one, who says the child knows it’s alcohol? Another, one drink does not impair you in any way (depending on how big your glass is I suppose). I don’t see anything wrong with sipping on one drink while you enjoy watching your children play. I don’t since I’m not a big fan of the tastes, but I don’t see it as something wrong or immoral like doing drugs for goodness sakes. That’s like comparing apples and oranges.
Marcia | August 14th, 2007 at 5:38 am
Interesting posts. I’m not much of a pot-smoker. But I will say that the story didn’t alarm me as much as it seems to have, others. Ilegal or not, I doubt that taking a hit of pot is that different from having a drink at dinner. My mother used to breast feed me while drinking a gin and tonic and smoking a cigarette and I turned out just fine. I’m not particularly advocating imbibement. etc — but I don’t think we need to hold mothers up to such an impossibly pure standard.
When it comes to destressing — I think that nothing beats taking time for yourself. And what you do on your own time is your own affair. I love meeting my girlfriends for friday happy hour. We’ve been gathering for seven years and it’s been a great way to unwind at the end of the week.
Brett Paesel | August 15th, 2007 at 7:51 am
I really can’t see anything wrong with a glass of wine or a drink when you’re unwinding at the end of the day, assuming you don’t have anywhere to be other than your living room, and assuming this isn’t a part of some crazy addictive lifestyle. How many people would blink at a dad drinking a beer at a barbecue in front of his kids?? Assuming you’re not getting wasted, what’s the issue? And, if dad is home, maybe you’ll have two drinks (gasp)… Dad can always drive in an emergency, can’t he?
Kristie | August 15th, 2007 at 1:31 pm
I agree with Brett. I read this story on Babble and the comments it stirred up, and most of them were very righteous.
I think if someone is a pot smoker, they have a tolerance and self-control while smoking it, where they know their own limits, and can have as much control over themselves while a bit stoned as someone who has a glass or two of wine. If they do this in the comfort of their own home, and not in front of their child, and not to excess, what’s the big deal?
A lot of our parents were hippies who probably smoked pot right in front of us. We just don’t remember, or thought it was cigarettes.
Zellmer | August 15th, 2007 at 8:11 pm