Potty Learning for Biological Daddy's???
Posted 23rd March 2009 by Deanna Leigh, tagged toddler, preschool, potty training
I hate the word training, as it applies to kids...it just seems like I am comparing my child to some kind of animal. So, I choose to call it 'learning', we are potty 'learning'. So, since the Monkey is looking towards at least trying to use the potty during the morning, before bed and bath and at lunchtime, I'm thinking let's go for it! My son was ubber excited and so pleased with his ability to use the potty at school that it seemed like the natural progression of things was taking place. I buy the training pants, I send them with his Biological and then, he comes back in diapers...yes, it's a self-defeating action to expect his Biological to work with me on anything that seems to require any kind of co-parenting.
So, that afternoon when we did our potty check and put on his McQueen Pants he says, 'No, I'm not a big boy'. He got upset and angry with me for trying to put his McQueen pants on him and told me that Daddy said it was okay to not be a 'big boy'.
Again, we take two steps back from the ONE step we took forward just two weeks ago. So, this weekend I watched the free DVD from Huggies that appeared in the mail out of nowhere and with the Monkey and Grandma learned the 'basics' of how to start. So, how do you start a Biological on the path to helping you start? There is not DVD from ANYONE on that topic. I've read co-parenting books, taken classes and even started going to therapy on my own...and, I'm not sure there is a way.
At any rate, I will be patient and loving and let it be...for now.
1 comment so far...
I'm in a similar boat...sent my (newly fully potty trained) daughter to visitation; she came back wearing a diaper. Thankfully, she's trained (learned? :)) enough that the switch back to panties was no big deal.
Is there anyone else who's around at visitation that you can get on board with this? (I'm thinking maybe Grandma...not your mom, but his?) OtherGrandma is around at my daughter's visitation and daughter tells me she's the one who takes her to the potty.
Also, how often does Biological see Monkey? My ex has visitation every other weekend...so I started my daughter right after a visitation, so she had two weeks under her belt (so to speak :)) before she went back.
The only other advice I have is to document, document, document. If Biological creates a pattern of refusing to cooperate for your son's best interest and you do one day have to call him on it (legally or however), it's best to have details.
Best of luck to you.
Flag as inappropriate Posted by Steel Magnolia on 23rd March 2009