Any former teachers out there? Any moms of teenagers?
I would LOVE some advice/suggestions for my almost 13 yr old. We're at our wits end . . .
He is super super freakin' smart. His last report card was Cs and Ds. NOT acceptable in this house.
We pulled all of *the toys* and that didn't phase him.
After talking to his teachers (7th grade) and them all reassuring us that he is more than capable of As and Bs, we have told him that his next progress report needs to show As and Bs or he is pulled from football for the 2008-2009 school year.
You know, I'm not a huge fan of Dr Phil, but one thing he said has stuck with me day in and day out . . . he said "you have to find their currency" when disciplining and molding your children.
I think that sports is his currency . . . but how do I get through the next umpteen number of days between now and then? Should I set myself a timeline for when I stop helping him daily with his homework (in an effort to get him caught back up?) . . .
i dont really have any adivce other than ask questions. is he shy? do you talk about what is going on at school? maybe there is a girl?
a famous story about my hubby when he was in school - he was doing homework but failing a class. Eventually his mom and dad sat him down and said 'you are doing your homework right? 'he sayd 'yes' and they said 'why arent you turning it in?" and he answers "well, you know that girl i like? well her locker is on the other end of the hall and if i walk her to her locker i dont have time to get back to mine and get my homework for that class"
it's funny NOW but at the time his parents were NOT ammused! teenagers have messed up logic and sometimes i think we just have to try to think like they think!
also, if it helps, my sister was one of those super smart never had to study types and when she hit highschool she suddenly started dropping in grades. Mostly because she felt like if she didnt have time to work on something and make it an A she would rather get a zero. (again with the messed up logic). taking away things didnt work with her either
maybe just a really cute tutor? sometimes kids are inspired most by peer pressure! if his friends are studying and getting good grades (or someone he looks up to) then he might also want to do that.
good luck and let us know what you find out!!
Last year I had the same issue with my 13 yo. Maybe he's bored in his classes as was mine!! First, I tried yanking privileges (confiscated all the power cords, changed all the passwords and grounded him). No improvement! So, I thought I'd try some positive reinforcement...we talked about what would be a good motivator for him, so I bribed him. If you get all As and B's you get X--and I told him it's an out and out bribe. As we talked about it, I realized he was bored to tears in alot of his classes..and it was hard for him to stay motivated. He'd get the subject matter in two minutes and then tune out. So we talked about challenging himself and his abilities etc. and he actually talked to a couple of his teachers all on his own (and got himself recommended for honors math classes) and got some more challenging work. This year he's in honors physics, honors geometry and honors algebra, and pulled off high honors (ok, except in woodshop, he got an 89!), plus played jv football. Another eye opener for him was we sat down and looked at jobs/pay you can get with only a hs degree-and what can you buy with that kind of pay check. He mentions that discussion alot : ). His HS football coach has also been key to keeping him focused and motivated gradewise!
Yay Olive! That's exactly what I was needing to hear - - some "been there, done that" with a success story at the end!
My BIL was just here (8th grade teacher) and he sat him down and talked lots with him.
Some of this is (I feel) just another extension of the "my parents are NOT cool" and he doesn't want to talk with us about *ANYTHING*. He reached out to my BIL in a big way and after that talk, I'm very impressed.
He brought home progress reports yesterday and he has improved at least one full letter grade in ALL classes (in a matter of 2-3 weeks).
Olive - how much assistance do you provide with homework? Reminding him of projects and such???
Kate - "cute tutor" NICE!! We have enough problems as it is with "cute babysitters" that come for the two littles . . . he finds himself wanting to hang out with the hotties!