When I was in graduate school, an instructor said to our class, "Working moms have at least two full-time jobs." She was arguing that we work AND we take care of our children/homes. After I had my daughter, I realized the list got a lot longer than that, though. We work, raise babies, walk pets, clean houses, cook dinners, do laundry, organize lives, develop relationships with other families/parents, etc.
I'm lucky, my husband does the cooking and the grocery shopping. He takes care of Wynn when I am away for meetings, etc. And loves her! But I also have a really hard time asking for what I need from him (i.e., I know that meeting was hugely stressful and that you have been preparing for it for a month, but can you please go change this poopy diaper because I am going to drop dead from exhaustion), which I blame, in part, on my own history (I had a SAHM andwas raised in a very traditional-ish, Southern family) and feelings around women doing emotional work for the family. It's so easy to read the literature and make assumptions about all of the changes that have taken place in the last 50 years. So many people do it! But in many ways, life now is just as difficult (or more so) than ever.
We have so many options! And there are movements of moms and dads and others in favor of this, that, and the other (and really always have been---but I am arguing proliferation here). Do you work full-time? Do you take time out of your career to raise your kids? Do you need to contribute financially to the household? Do you put your infant in childcare? If so, do you hire a nanny or do they go to a childcare center? Do you divide up the household chores so that they are evenly distributed? Or do you take on more because you feel like it's what you should do? How do you juggle? When do you take personal time? Or is personal time shelved? Who do you talk to?
Here's a stretch, but I think SAHMs and SAHDs and part-time employed parents, etc. should be guaranteed health insurance, at a minimum. And since we know that women often make far less than men in the workforce (glass ceiling that everyone so eloquently says is gone---right), how frustrating is it that we are totally overloaded? Compensation, please!!!
