Today was hard to get back to work after the long weekend spent with the kids. ..
We had such a great weekend, spending 2 days at Sesame Place and then Monday playing with them all afternoon in the yard. It was relaxing yet exhausting!
Then when I put them to bed and think about the day we just had, I wonder: could I be a Stay at Home Mom? Would that great feeling of having spent a great day, giving them so much of my time, would that feeling subside if I were a Stay at Home Mom?
This hunts me as comes the guilt of taking them of daycare..yet, I don't think I could do it. As much as at times I want it and wanted it when they were born, I don't think I could give them 110% every day and enjoy it...and of course that makes me feel guilty...Isn't it what a Mom is supposed to do? Isn't our "purpose" in life! How can I say I am happy to work and leave them with total strangers who care for them. Is that right? Does anyone feel that way?
I think being a working Mom makes me be a better Mom. that might sound silly but my Mom was a stay at home mom and never did anything with us really. I mean, I make a point to cook with my kids, to paint with them, run around in the yard, play tea parties with them and read books. My mom was a great mom, but I think she was bored...
Anyway, I was happy to go back to work today, even though exhausted!
So I thank you for your candor. You totally validated my feelings and that's all I needed!
Any way you slice it, motherhood is hard work, whether you stay at home, work from home or work outside the home. But I must say, I very much look forward to the *break* that my part-time work provides! I definitely think it makes me a better mom to have that outlet.