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I'm pregnant and meeting with my boss next week to talk about life "post-baby." Right now, I have a job for which I travel extensively -- sometimes for a week or more, up to eight times a month. I can't imagine how that will work with a newborn, especially while I'm breastfeeding. But should I let my boss know that I don't see how I can stay on in that position? I'm hoping he will give me a new position that doesn't involve travel or find a way to reduce my travel by job sharing. I know they value me, but I don't know what they're thinking at all. How do I handle this? How much of my feelings do I give away?”

Asked by stajahnke on 9th February 2008

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Comments so Far...

Hey girl, I've got a 4 month old daughter. Life post-baby is definitely VERY different and if you're interested in working from home so you can actually spend time with him/her after birth, let me know! Check out www.mystressfreeincome.com

Flag as inappropriate Posted by Sheraline on 19th March 2008
Congratulations!! I was in the exact same boat as you. I was travelling every week up until my baby was born and my boss was delusional that I would be back in 6 weeks to get back out there on the road. Wow, how your priorities change after you have your baby. But its not only that, let's be realistic, you can't travel that much and have a newborn at home you want to breast feed. Virtually impossible. My advice, be direct with your boss. I would tell him/her, that Yes I love my job and I don't want to entertain leaving, but it obviously isn't going to be feasiable for me to travel as much after the baby comes. Just tell them how loyal you are the company and ask your boss if he/she has any ideas on how you can make it work. Personally I had to change companies, because I had a crazy boss that said....sorry, just because you had a baby doesn't give you an excuse not to be out on the road bringing in deals. Gotta love sales!!!

Flag as inappropriate Posted by Evansmom on 13th February 2008
I'd also like to congraulate you on your blessed event. I fully understand your trepidation. I was working rotating shift work as a police dispatcher when I got preggers. The one thing I realized was that, as much as I liked the job at times, it wasn't going to work after I had my daughter. I think you have to be very realistic with yourself and with your boss. That said, it angers me greatly that this kind of decision is ALWAYS on our shoulders, not the fathers. This is, unfortunately, part and partial why the glass ceiling keeps women down AND why we're look on as less than men in the $$$$ department. No one, and I do mean NO ONE would EVER question the man in these matter, yet we're the ones that gets dumped on and dumped out.

How much you should push for it and let them know, IMHO, depends on how "family friendly" your company is. Whether we like it or not, companies do look on us with that attitude of "she's not going to give it her all cause she's got to go home." Some of you may remember the movie "Baby Boom." Unfortunately, a LOT of that attitude still exists. Perhaps you might want to consider putting some feelers out for other positions if you suspect they're not going to be open to your suggestions. Better to be forearmed and forewarned than go in blind.

Flag as inappropriate Posted by JDaffron on 10th February 2008
Congratulations on the pregnancy. You are in for an amazing adventure!! As a first time mom, I can tell you that it was amazing how dramatically my priorities changed ... and I wasn't nearly as proactive/introspective as you are. So, you're already ahead of the game. My own thoughts are to be honest when queried and even more clearly communicate your position if you don't think that your boss understood it. I had delusions about keeping up at the same pace as previously (work until 7 pm, continue on difficult projects), but quickly learned that my number one priority is my son and that I only willing to "work to live," rather than "live to work" which was a huge change for me.

Flag as inappropriate Posted by KC on 9th February 2008