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Work It, Mom! Team | 19th Sep | 15 comments  Do you get up earlier or go to bed later to get some "me" time?
Nataly | 18th Sep | 9 comments  I'm having trouble with a couple of things.
#1) My son turned a year a couple weeks ago. He still...
oceans mom | 12th Sep | 9 comments When you pick up your kids from school, are they into talking to you about their day? I find that my...
Nataly | 10th Sep | 9 comments  Have the interviews with Sarah Palin changed your mind (one way or the other) about her readiness to...
mamajama | 26th Sep | 9 comments |
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We often talk about the guilt we feel when we dont' spend enough time with our kids. Does anyone feel guilt when you don't spend time with your husband? Some good things happened for me recently and when I boast about it to my hubby, he said what does that mean for me? You will be less available?
Asked by Vera Babayeva, 26th Jun Answer this now »
Showing 6 replies to this question
Vera Babayeva 28th Jun
Nataly 28th Jun
I
think
this
is
a
great
point
and
too
rarely
discussed.
I
admit
often
that
in
the
equation
of
job,
kid,
husband
I
take
my
husband
for
granted
more
often
the
other
two.
It's
bad.
I
feel
horrible
about
it
often.
I
have
a
friend
who
is
getting
divorced.
She
told
me
that
she
could
not
handle
three
things
--
kids,
career,
and
marriage
--
and
that
she
knows
she
sacrificed
her
marriage
as
she
became
successful
in
her
career
and
was
a
mom.
This
totally
freaks
me
out...
Genesis 28th Jun
I
definitely
feel
guilty
about
not
spending
time
with
my
husband,
but
at
the
same
time,
when
I
have
time
to
be
with
him,
he´s
not
here!
Kid-free
time
alone
is
non-existent
since
he
leaves
most
days
at
4
or
5
pm
and
comes
back
at
3-6
am
and
then
sleeps
until
9.
We
do
try
to
get
out
once
a
month
with
each
other.
Tiffany M. 28th Jun
Before
I
found
out
I
was
pregnant,
my
husband
and
I
made
a
pact
that
even
after
we
had
children,
at
least
once
a
week
we
were
going
to
go
out
and
have
some
"us"
time.
We
have
done
it
every
since
we've
been
married.
Even
if
we
just
sit
in
the
living
room
on
the
floor
eating
pizza
and
watching
movies,
it's
still
time
together,
and
we
always
have
a
blast.
I
was
always
taught
that
marriage
comes
first,
though
so
many
moms
think
the
kids
should
come
first.
No
...
the
kids
knowing
that
mom
and
dad
are
happy
together
and
always
find
a
way
to
spend
time
with
one
another
teaches
them
what
a
marriage
is
supposed
to
be
like.
Not
only
that,
it's
a
comfort
to
them
to
be
in
a
household
where
they
have
two
parents
who
love
each
other
as
much
as
they
love
their
children.
Diane 27th Jun
I
think
we
both
feel
very
aware
that
we
have
less
quality
time
together
than
pre-child,
but
it's
okay.
I
think
it's
a
stage
of
life
you
go
through
and
it's
worth
it.
My
husband
is
really
understanding
on
this
issue,
actually.
I
guess
I'm
lucky?
Stephanie Calahan 27th Jun
A
really
smart
family
member
once
told
me
(when
I
first
became
a
parent)
that
no
matter
what,
I
should
put
my
relationship
with
my
husband
before
my
kids.
Kids
want
to
know
that
their
parents
are
solid.
It
gives
them
comfort
and
empowers
them
to
have
good
relationships.
I'm
glad
that
I
got
that
early.
We
don't
always
hit
the
mark,
but
we
certainly
try,
so
there
is
no
animosity.
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Nataly, I think we all tend to take our partners for granted from time to time whether we have careers or not. Your friend is getting a divorce because she couldn't handle all three or because her husband couldn't handle her success? I think there are a lot of men out there that are still having difficulties accepting the fact that women can be successful. My sister is a mother of three, married has a very demanding job, she is a head nurse at Lenox Hill Hospital and she is also a part time student getting her BS/MS in nursing. She makes more money then her husband and he is not bothered. He is happy. He has a 9-5 job and takes care of the kids in the morning and in the evening. He cooks, does laundry. He is never threatened by her success and people do ask how he feels about his wife's job, salary, being back in school. I think men have some learning to do and then more women will be able to have all three.
I often talk to my husband about my aspirations. I also tell him how I feel about him. I ask for his support and help. He understands but sometimes will complain. I think talking about your fears and hopes helps.