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5Most Popular Questions
How can I stop arguing with my husband? I need him to get a part-time job to pay some of the bills because although I am the full bread winner, I don't make enough to get the credit debt down and pay extra stuff. We argue because he is a second language speaker and has a skill but he is so slow about applying anywhere...
Asked by Stel , 3rd Jul Answer this now »
Showing 5 replies to this question
Martha 22nd Jul
momof2lovelies 3rd Jul
You
are
not
going
to
stop
arguing
with
him
until
he
gets
a
job.
Unfortunately,
the
ladies
are
right!
Some
men
need
the
woman
to
be
thre
firecracker
to
make
them
move
it!
You
will
beceome
resentful
over
time
and
it
may
destroy
your
marriage.
Lay
down
the
law,
give
him
a
time
line
to
get
crackin!
Ask him if it makes him feel good to see you so upset? Ask him how he feels knowing that you may potentially need to get a second job? Tell him needs to PARTNER with you and there's no choice whether or not he will become that for you...he NEEDS TO!
JDaffron 3rd Jul
And
therein
lies
the
problem.
Because
they
KNOW
you'll
do
it
for
them,
their
attitude
is
"why
should
I?
You
can
do
it."
That
causes
a
vicious
circle.
KathyHowe 3rd Jul
You
can't
really
force
anyone
to
do
anything.
That
includes
spouses.
I'd
suggest
looking
for
a
part-time
job
for
yourself
if
it
is
important
to
you
to
pay
down
the
debt.
I'm
assuming
he
is
currently
home
with
the
kid(s)
full-time.
Let
him
continue
to
do
that
and
you
continue
to
earn
they
paycheck(s)
to
support
the
family.
oceans mom 3rd Jul
Okay,
here
is
what
I
have
done
and
maybe
it
will
work.
My
husband
would
not
have
his
good
job
now
if
it
wasn't
for
me!
I
looked
online
for
him
and
sent
him
all
of
the
jobs
that
were
for
him.
I
stood
over
him
while
he
sent
out
his
resume
and
cover
letter.
Now
he
has
a
better
job
than
I
do.
He
would
have
never
even
looked
on
his
own
and
he
admits
it.
I
was
also
married
when
I
was
very
young
to
someone
else,
same
thing.
He
did
not
"feel"
like
sending
in
his
resume
although
he
was
jobless
and
smart.
I
sent
it
in.
He
was
the
last
person
called
for
an
interview
and
was
hired.
He
has
now
moved
up
to
the
position
that
he
has
always
wanted
with
that
company
and
is
making
lots
of
money.
It's
a
sad
but
true
fact
that
many
men
don't
do
anything
unless
you
do
it
for
them!
|
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Instead of being a man he got angry, violently angry and threw me to the floor, with our 3yr old daughter in my arms threatening to kill me because if I didn't like it that he wouldn't work tough. I managed to get my child and I away from him when she started to scream he realized she got hurt and backed off enough for us to get away. Needless to say that is why we are one less as a family.
Show this to your husband and explaine you do not want things going this badly. Men who do not want to work, or to help when things get bad are extremely immature and still need mommy and think you are susposed to mommy them.
Best of luck
Martha in Laconia