Member Questions

Bad day. OK. How would you feel if you were watching a friend's kid (play date) and he wandered off down the street without you knowing it for at least 15 minutes. What if the mom had originally told you it was okay to allow the kids to be outside for 20 minutes without supervision. (Note, I had never allowed these kids outside without me before, but knew the mother allowed this boy outside on his own--he's almost 5--I also knew I had to attend to a toddler). -I did get distracted with stuff and feel like complete sh--- But I'm frustrated because I stuck with the parameters that we had agreed to. Her son took off because he spotted his brother playing one house over with their new best friend (the boy was angry because he had been excluded--the mom had kept it a secret from him) -I'm so upset about what happened, almost to the point of feeling as if I'm incompetent and that my kids aren't safe enough with me in charge. -after a week of barely speaking the mom says she's not mad at me and stll trusts me, but noted all 3 things that have gone wrong at my house in regard to her kids ---(I've had her kids over at least 2-4 X each week for a year or more. And of course, she's had bumps and bruises happen to kids she's had over for play dates). Plus, her kids aren't allowed over anymore--but they were playing at the neighbors 2days ago without the neighbor in sight. I have always been honest with her about any and all happenings with her kids at my house -big and small. Now i feel condemned, guilty and so much more. sorry for the long note, juggling far too many emotions right now.”

Asked by Susan on 29th July 2008