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I'm a divorced mom with shared custody, however shes with me most of the time (thank god!). My daughter is so miserable at school, but my ex won't even discuss homeschooling and I know he's going to take me back to court for doing so. I CAN NOT send her back into that school. Her shrink doesn't believe in homeschooling. HELP!!!”

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  • Wow - you sound completely overwhelmed and alone. My initial response is to NOT consider homeschooling as your ONLY option. Your daughter is obviously having trouble at school, but you don't say what type of trouble: is it poor grades, bullying? What I do know is you want what's best for your daughter and sometimes that's what makes parenting decisions so difficult.

    Taking your daughter out of school, without trying different approaches first, can be construed as running away from the problem, and I doubt that's the message you want to instill in your daughter. Trouble with the boss? Quit the job. Trouble with your parents? run away. Feeling depressed? drink alcohol to numb the feelings. There's NO QUICK FIX.

    The bottom line is that if your daughter is in serious danger, and school is putting her in that danger, other options have to be considered. If all other options have been utilized, tutoring, charges filed against the bully, IEP for learning disabilities, etc etc etc... the homeschooling maybe the best answer.

    Remember that her psychiatrist's opinion is just an opinion. Unfortunately, you need to accept that your ex-husbands opinion is not as easily dismissible, it is equal to yours. And as hard as it maybe you need to role model adult responsible behavior by respecting your ex husband's opinion, (which doesn't mean you agree with it.) To get his respect for your wish to home school, educate him on what you've tried to do so far, what you are willing to try, and how you two can work together to come to a decision. This is an excellent time for the ex husband to step up and step in and help with your daughter's problems. You need the help, I'm sure, and you'd be more willing to consider his opinion if he acted on his words of concern for his daughter. And document document document. If your ex doesn't help, and you ask for help, write it down. This all goes to court to show what you're trying to do, and his lack of support except to haul you into court to challenge you...

    Lastly, be careful what you wish for. Home schooling is terribly intensive, regulated, and exhausting. Can you be emotionally healthy and a resilient capable parent, being single and having your daughter 24/7? something to think about. Good Luck!!!

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by golfwidow1 on 5th March 2011